


A Kind of Magic

by Miss_Murdered



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Awkward Romance, Explicit Sexual Content, Grumpy!Sousuke, Healer!Makoto, Light Angst, M/M, Magical Realism, Masturbation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-04-18 16:02:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 35,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4711982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Murdered/pseuds/Miss_Murdered
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a high-school injury ruins his swimming career, Sousuke searches for a way to rebuild his life and heal his damaged shoulder. This search leads him to the town of Iwatobi and a guy by the name of Makoto… a guy who might be more than he seems and might have more than one way to help him heal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was the last stretch of Sousuke’s journey and for that reason it seemed to be the slowest. It had taken him a few train switches and plenty of hanging around for it to be the final leg and now he was on the last train, Sousuke was feeling particularly impatient.

He supposed he should look outside and admire the countryside. It did appear a beautiful area and it was a warm sunny autumn day so it seemed even prettier. Or it would have if Sousuke had been in the right mood. As all Sousuke wanted now was time to be free of transportation and be able to stretch his long legs that had seemed cramped so many damn times on this long and frustrating day.

Sousuke had never been to Iwatobi before. Neither had he heard of it prior to a few days ago. It seemed to be a small town where fishing was the most prominent industry and employer. He supposed it looked nice enough but his visit was intended to be brief so it wasn’t like he was going to spend time exploring it. Instead, Sousuke planned on spending one or two nights and then head back home to Tokyo, hopefully successfully. He really hoped it wasn’t another wasted journey.

Sighing under his breath, Sousuke leant his head against the cool glass of the window and looked out at the flashing greenery that passed by. He could start to see the ocean, it gleaming and sparkling and Sousuke felt a sense of excitement at being by the sea for the first time in a while. It had been a long time since Sousuke had swum in the ocean or jogged by the water’s edge and he supposed even if he was unsuccessful on his visit he could enjoy that simple pleasure.

He didn’t want to be unsuccessful again. He didn’t want another pointless venture. All Sousuke wanted was _something_ that would help and at this stage, he was willing to try anything.

Sousuke wasn’t supposed to be wasting his time travelling to random towns, villages and cities. He should’ve been able to take his university place in Tokyo and spend his time training in the competition-sized pool for his dream – a chance of a spot on the Japanese National Swimming Team. It was a dream he had harboured since childhood, one that was aided by his best friend and fellow swimming enthusiast Rin. They had spent all their time as kids swimming – they’d joined clubs and swam in relays and any regional competition they could. As they had got older it had become more competitive and soon they were training together daily, jogging every morning at dawn and swimming huge distances under the watchful eye of their schools coaches. By the time they got to high school, they were the best swimmers in their school and it was whispered behind their backs everywhere they went that they would be Olympians one day.

It wasn’t under his final year of high school that it happened. Sousuke knew he pushed his body hard. His work ethic was exemplary and he was always used as an example to others. Rin would tease him about that, “tch” under his breath and warn him not to push himself so hard. Sousuke didn’t listen. He supposed he rarely did listen to anyone else. He’d always been stubborn, always so focused that they day his shoulder began to hurt, he ignored it.

His specialism was butterfly and Sousuke soon found that the shoulder pain was getting worse. He continued to ignore it, training harder and gritting his teeth when he found the pain grew too much but it wasn’t long until it became unbearable. It didn’t take long for Rin to figure something out.

In agony after practices, Sousuke would ensure he was the last to use the showers and he often found himself nearly in tears as the water grew cool on his skin as he sat on the tiled floor. Rin found him like that one day – in pain and with water in his eyes, his dark hair covering his forehead. From then on Sousuke couldn’t hide.

The school knew Sousuke was one of their best swimmers and it didn’t take long for them to organise physios and any additional help they could. He started wearing a shoulder brace and his training regime was changed. The steps were encouraging as his shoulder hurt less but it soon became apparent that he was no longer the same competitive swimmer he had been.

It was during a leg of a relay that Sousuke knew he couldn’t do it anymore. The pain was immense, all consuming and for a moment, he felt like he was going to drown. He didn’t, instead, all Sousuke felt was a blackness as he finished his leg of the relay and waited at the side of the pool, exhausted and barely able to hold on.

Rin helped him then, reached out his hand as Sousuke struggled to lift the weight of his body out of the water but after that Sousuke knew he was done.

It hurt, not just physically, but emotionally as Sousuke started to let go of swimming. One of the coaches suggested Sousuke should think about coaching as he had the talent for it but Sousuke soon started to resent swimming and what his failed dream felt like. Sharing a room with Rin became unbearable and he stopped their joint jogs and training. He stopped showing at swim practice despite the fact he was still part of the team and Sousuke began to slip into a despair he wasn’t sure how to get out of. It only got worse as Rin moved on, as there was this new Nanase guy on the team who Rin enthused about the whole damn time and Sousuke began to isolate himself and avoid everyone.

Without swimming, Sousuke wasn’t sure what to do. He focused on his schoolwork as best as he could but he was distracted and the university’s that had been interested in him due to his swimming prowess soon were not interested at all. Sousuke had to rethink and he didn’t know what the hell else he could do.

Graduating was painful as Sousuke felt like bystander, as though he watched everyone else pass him by and though he was glad for Rin and his potential Olympic opportunity, he couldn’t help being bitter. And he couldn’t help threatening Nanase a few times. It just happened.

Now everyone else was at university and Sousuke… wasn’t. Unsure of what to do and what to study, Sousuke instead moved back home and began working at his father’s hardware store. It was a dull job but it earned him some money and Sousuke soon began to save it up as he figured out what he was going to do.

He missed swimming like a dull ache and without the constant repetitive strain his shoulder seemed to be getting better but it wasn’t going to heal overnight. And he probably wasn’t going to be competitive again nor be able to swim with Rin.

Rin visited even though he was busy with university and it was as he was leaving for his train he said the words that had begun Sousuke on this stupid journey.

“You know… you gave up too quick, Sou. You should look into other options… I’m sure with how stubborn you are we could swim together again, huh?”

Rin had touched his shoulder gently and Sousuke didn’t flinch from the touch, in fact, it didn’t hurt at all. As he saw Rin’s smile, Sousuke felt a jolt in his stomach. He had just given up. He hadn’t fought and he’d just quit. That wasn’t very much like him and suddenly Sousuke felt a stirring in his gut.

And that began his quest to find some way of healing his injury.

Doctors could only do so much and Sousuke had given up on that rapidly. He was taught stretches, given creams with numbing agents and given exercises but they did little. Soon he began to think more widely and he began looking into other avenues.

After much internet research, Sousuke had begun his search to find another cure for his shoulder and soon he had met a variety of interesting people who had so far been unhelpful. He’d tried different therapies, different concoctions of teas and pills and had meditated in numerous ways. He’d steamed, he’d been in ice baths and he’d done everything in between. He’d found the strangest shops in Tokyo and travelled to shrines in the middle of forests. And everything Sousuke had done so far had done little for his shoulder.

He supposed his shoulder didn’t feel healed but Sousuke had started to feel better than he had for quite some time. He started to train again, swim again, and even though he was taking it easy, Sousuke was beginning to feel like his old self again. He felt focused and determined and Sousuke was sure he would be able to make his comeback and re-apply for one of the universities that had been interested in him prior to his injury.

He felt hopeful even if he was getting irritated by all the different cures that hadn’t helped so far. But he was still determined and maybe, just _maybe_ this guy in Iwatobi might be the one.

The guy in Iwatobi had been recommended by some internet friends and so Sousuke felt a little more hopeful than if this name had popped up on some random search. Unlike many other healers, this one didn’t have his own website and instead all that Sousuke could find was a small blog page that highlighted a few details regarding the guy. His name was Tachibana Makoto and Sousuke had found the email address and contacted him, waiting impatiently for a response.

It hadn’t taken long and soon a few emails were exchanged. It seemed Tachibana was curious about how Sousuke had come across him and Sousuke had mentioned a few people he had apparently seen. This seemed to work as the messages after that were more friendly and an appointment was set within a few weeks. Sousuke had given brief explanation of his shoulder injury but Tachibana had said that he didn’t need that information – they would talk about that when they had their appointment. Sousuke didn’t question Tachibana as he had come to learn that the sort of people he dealt with were often somewhat odd and Tachibana was probably the same. So instead he agreed and finalised his appointment.

Now Sousuke was approaching Iwatobi and the train was beginning to slow down as it arrived at the station. Iwatobi was a small town and Sousuke was sure it was difficult to get lost but he also knew he had an appalling sense of direction so he pulled up a map on his phone prior to their arrival. His appointment wasn’t until tomorrow so Sousuke planned to stay over at a guest house in the town. He had rang ahead so he was expected and so Sousuke pulled up the walking route to his resting stop for the night instead of to Tachibana’s home. He supposed it was a good idea that he didn’t have the appointment tonight. Sousuke felt stiff as he began to move his limbs and he felt his shoulder more pronounced than usual as he left the train and stepped out onto the platform.

The day had been warm but Sousuke felt a slight chill as he walked slowly away from the train and station. It was early evening by the time of his arrival but it was also the cool sea air that made him shiver and Sousuke took a deep breath of it as he listened to the distant sound of gulls. It felt peaceful as he walked and Sousuke barely saw anybody as he took his long strides around the town, his phone poised in his hand to check his directions as he walked.

He thought of Rin then, Rin elbowing him in the ribs and mocking him for being able to get lost “anywhere” but Sousuke only shook away the thought. As since he’d started this attempt to find someone to help him heal, he’d travelled far and wide and only got lost once or twice. Which was a lot better than what Rin would expect.

Despite his bad sense of direction, Sousuke was able to find the house without any trouble and he paused outside it. The night was beginning to draw in and he had a long day of travel but Sousuke didn’t feel tired. He felt like he wanted to run, like he wanted to explore the town and so he fidgeted with his bag and debated about whether he should go in or just walk. Yet his moment of indecisiveness was ended as he saw the door open slightly and a small head peeked out of the opening.

“Are you coming in?” a little boy asked and Sousuke cocked his head as the door opened wider.

The little boy had pale hair and bright eyes and Sousuke couldn’t help the confused expression on his own face at the appearance. “I’m looking for a guest house…”

Smiling widely, the boy nodded. “You found it.”

Unable to suddenly be rude to the kid, Sousuke shrugged. “Then I guess I’m coming in.”

“I’ll shout grandmother!”

The shout was loud enough that it seemed to echo through the empty streets and within moments another figure appeared at the door.

“Yamazaki?” the old lady questioned.

“Yeah.”

“Welcome to Iwatobi,” she said, smiling.


	2. Chapter 2

The guest house was small and Sousuke soon got the impression that it was a rare occasion for an out of towner to stay at the place at this time of year. He supposed they got plenty of tourists during the summer but now it was early autumn and so his payment was probably very welcome.

It appeared it was _very_ welcome as Sousuke was shown to a modest bedroom and then instructed that the evening meal would be in an hour’s time. He debated about going for a run and exploring the town but instead he opted to catch up with his family and Rin, sending messages to confirm he’d arrived in Iwatobi.

Rin was always interested to know about Sousuke’s progress even if it seemed there was nothing to report so Sousuke opened up his laptop and typed, telling him about the journey and how he had not got lost. His brief messages concluded, Sousuke lay back on the small bed and wiggled his toes, a sudden tiredness coming over him.

The bed was too small for him, his feet off the edge but Sousuke didn’t mind as he looked up at the white ceiling. He wasn’t staying for long and really it didn’t matter how well he slept. This was just another brief stop in his journey. His stomach growled from lack of food and Sousuke laid his hand on it as he took deep breaths and let his eyes close. He knew he shouldn’t nap – that he should do _something_ more useful with his time but Sousuke let himself relax and within a few moments, he fell into a light sleep.

A light sleep that was disturbed by the loudest knocking on the door.

“Ugh…” Sousuke grunted and with the shock of waking so abruptly, he ended up falling off the bed in a heap.

The sound of Sousuke hitting the floor seemed inordinately loud and a moment later the door opened. Sousuke looked up to see the little boy from earlier but he was not alone this time. Alongside him was what Sousuke could only assume was an older brother due to the extreme likeness in appearance.

“You okay?” the guy asked, a slight smirk on his lips.

Sousuke glared up as he got to his feet, his large frame seeming to ache from his sudden short fall.

“Yeah,” he replied, gruffly, as he scratched at a spot at the back of his neck.

“Hayato… go tell grandmother we’re coming.”

The boy smiled and left the room with a quick nod and even quicker feet. Which left Sousuke with the assumed older brother. Sousuke couldn’t help taking the guy in, he was easy on the eye, but he dismissed him as rapidly as he looked at him. His eyes were that same bright of his younger brother, his hair had this flip to it that seemed unnatural and his smile was more of a smirk. Sousuke could guess why that was. After all, he had just seen Sousuke fall off the bed with all the elegance of some kind of baby elephant.

He was wearing a polo shirt and a hooded jacket over the top and Sousuke could see the logo on both items of clothing -“ISC – Iwatobi Swimming Club”. It made Sousuke curious as the guy did appear very much the same age as himself but he didn’t say anything as they stood looking at one another.

“I’m Kisumi… sorry about Hayato. We don’t get many visitors anymore. Or at least young people… we generally only get old couples that he is told to be quiet around.”

Sousuke gave a small smile to try and appear less threatening. “It’s fine… I just didn’t expect to be woken so suddenly.”

Kisumi shrugged. “We’ll tell him for tomorrow morning… no waking you up. You made the entire house shake when you fell.”

The sentence was ended with a wink and while Sousuke was irked by the guy, he ignored his irritation though he did keep one hand in a fist by his side.  

“We should get down… my grandmother’s food is some of the best you’ll ever eat…”  

And with that, Kisumi turned and walked down the stairs leaving Sousuke somewhat dumbstruck by the whole occurrence. He was going to blame his sudden waking up and his impromptu nap for his slow movement but with a shrug of shoulders  Sousuke followed and was assaulted by the smell of food as soon as he walked down the stairs. It did smell good and Sousuke soon found himself presented with a variety of different dishes and was encouraged to take his place.

It seemed Hayato had already selected that he was going to sit next to Sousuke and Sousuke didn’t complain as he was instructed to help himself. Sousuke did and soon he felt at home in the guest house, thanking them multiple times for their hospitality. It was as they were eating the question was asked and Sousuke paused in his chewing to answer it.

“Why are you in Iwatobi?” Hayato asked as he looked up towards Sousuke.

“Shhh, Hayato! We don’t ask guests such questions,” the grandmother chided.

Hayato’s face turned from the happy smile to a frown and he looked down into his food. Sousuke smiled in the direction of the grandmother and then put a hand gently on Hayato’s shoulder.

“I don’t mind such questions… it’s okay.” Sousuke took a deep breath and noticed that all the eyes on the table were on him – even Hayato’s who was looking up curiously rather than at his food. “I’m here as I hurt my shoulder and I’ve been looking for someone to help me with it.”

Sousuke didn’t expect the response that he got for that. It was a loud snort from Kisumi who seemed amused. Sousuke looked up to see a hand was over his mouth and he frowned at the act.

“Ahh… you are here to see Makoto, aren’t you?”

The old woman had spoken and Sousuke looked towards her as she seemed to be sending a glare to her eldest grandson.

Sousuke nodded. “Yes… I’ve heard he could help.”

Another noise came from Kisumi’s mouth but this time it was more effectively muffled by the hand near his mouth. A glare was sent again in Kisumi’s direction and Sousuke wanted to know why the hell Kisumi was so amused by what he was saying. Maybe it was because this Makoto was a charlatan and he was a stupid city guy. He guessed that and Sousuke let his eyes drift down to the food in front of him rather than look at the people around the table. Yes, he’d been made into a fool again. He was stupid to think this Makoto could help him… stupid to think he could get better. Stupid to think he had a shot again.

Sousuke felt a hand on his and he looked at it – at the veins that stood in sharp relief to the pale skin and the brittle finger nails. He looked up at the old woman who was smiling.

“Ignore my grandson… I really do hope Makoto can help you…he has helped many before.”

The smile seemed genuine and Sousuke didn’t know what to say. But he didn’t need to say anything as Kisumi spoke, his voice showing a trace of bitterness.

“Yeah… the great Heart of Iwatobi.”

“Kisumi!” the old woman shouted and slammed her hand on the wooden table. “Don’t be rude when we have guests!”

Sousuke looked up to see that Kisumi was getting to his feet, his body seeming to move lazy and laconically.

“Fine… I’ll eat elsewhere.”

With that, Kisumi left and there was a silence over the room. Sousuke felt Hayato fidget next to him and he heard a sigh from the grandmother.

“There’s history between Makoto and Kisumi… they grew up together but their ways have parted since and there’s some hurt there… ignore my grandson. Makoto should be able to help you.”

The rest of the meal passed in silence and Sousuke wished he could leave without seeming rude. He didn’t really feel hungry anymore but he continued to eat and when he was finally too full to eat anymore he commended the cook and offered to do the dishes.

She swatted away his hands. “You are a paying guest! I don’t expect your help.”

The atmosphere had become so like being a part of someone’s family that Sousuke had almost forgotten that he was paying for the guest house. He nodded and thanked her once again before he finally was able to leave the oddly uncomfortable atmosphere. Hayato followed though stopped as Sousuke went up the stairs. Sousuke turned to see the little boy shyly looking down.

“I’m sorry about my brother… he can be a hot head at times.”

Sousuke smiled back at the boy and shrugged. “We all can be, don’t worry.”

Hayato cheered up then, a large smile on his face. “I just didn’t want you to leave too soon!”

It seemed there was something more to the comment but Sousuke didn’t get chance to question it as Hayato turned and ran back towards the kitchen, his run almost like a skip. Sousuke just shook it off – he wasn’t sure what the family dynamics were or why the two boys lived with their grandmother and he wasn’t going to ask. Though it did make him slightly grateful for being an only child as he hadn’t had to deal with a younger sibling and their energy.

Sousuke arrived back in his temporary room and checked his laptop. There was a very brief message from Rin that stated he was glad that Sousuke had arrived in Iwatobi (and not got lost) and that he wanted an update as soon as Sousuke had anything to say. He debated about replying that he would but Sousuke just closed his computer and sat on the bed for a moment.

The whole situation seemed strange – he was going to see this Makoto who was the “Heart of Iwatobi”. This Makoto that was probably no older than him. Sousuke was now getting sure this was going to be another fruitless journey and he felt an anger flare up in his gut.

It wasn’t damn fair. Sousuke had worked so hard, had tried so hard and still it had all failed. It seemed no matter what he did that nothing went right and he was sick of trying when everything he did just seemed to end in disappointment and broken dreams.

With a grunt, Sousuke stood back up. He couldn’t brood – he couldn’t sit and lie on a bed and think of how the world hated him and everything sucked. Instead, he had to _do_ something. He walked towards the window and saw that the night was drawing in and he opened the window slightly to feel the breeze. It had been breezy when Sousuke had arrived in Iwatobi and it seemed it had got worse since his nap and meal. He could almost feel that a storm was coming on and Sousuke wondered whether he should just stay in and sleep.

“A little rain never hurt anyone,” he murmured to himself and Sousuke turned towards his duffle bag.

From his duffle bag Sousuke dug out his running clothes and quickly changed into them. The sweat pants and jacket were from his high school days and Sousuke could almost smell the chlorine from the pool in the fabric. He knew he was imagining it, that it was just some weird nostalgia thing that he was reliving but he still vividly remembered the past when he had been invincible. He carried his sneakers down the stairs and informed the old woman that he was going for a run. She looked a little shocked at his decision but only raised her eyebrows briefly before she smiled.

“There’s a storm coming…be careful.”

“Thanks,” he said with a slight bow before he opened the door and sat on the step to put his sneakers on.

It was as he was tying them up that Sousuke smelt smoke and he turned to see that Kisumi was sat leaning against the house, a cigarette in his hand and his eyes looking skyward at the threatening clouds.

“Going for a run? There’s meant to be a storm…”

Sousuke finished his laces and stood up. He’d always known his height was impressive and he’d always been taller than most of his peers so he knew he could be intimidating. With Kisumi sat on the ground, it made Sousuke even more imposing but the guy didn’t even flinch. Instead all he did was flutter his eyelashes and take a drag of the cigarette.

“I’ve heard… doesn’t matter,” Sousuke said gruffly. He wanted to ask more – wanted to find out why Makoto was the “Heart of Iwatobi” but he didn’t dare and only turned so he could start his stretches.

“You want to know my problem with Makoto, don’t you?” Kisumi asked and Sousuke looked back over his shoulder to see that Kisumi had stood up and was now leaning against the house.

“I don’t really care… I’m not here for long.”

Kisumi only blew some smoke from his mouth and smirked. “We’ll see if you care after…”

Sousuke didn’t want to continue this annoying and infuriating conversation so he didn’t do his full stretches and started his run at a slow jogging pace. He wasn’t sure of his route and knew he should try and remember his directions but the oddness of the night just made him want to run so Sousuke just made his way to the ocean, the cool breeze brushing his air in his eyes as he went.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long to update... I had a vacation and then had to settle back into RL. Also feeling a little bit rusty writing fic but getting my groove back...

The run was what Sousuke needed. Within a few narrow streets, he had forgotten about the conversation with Kisumi and was remembering the reason he was in Iwatobi in the first place. Hope. That was the reason. That he hadn’t fully given up. And maybe this Makoto deserved mockery, maybe there was nothing to him but a grand name but still… Sousuke had to try.

After all, he had nothing left to lose.

His mood improved as he ran, the movement of his body and limbs and the sound of his footfalls soothing him. This lift in his demeanour lasted as he ran towards the ocean, the sudden view of the water unhindered by houses and buildings taking his breath away. The ocean was rolling, the waves crashing harshly and Sousuke stopped to catch his breath and do some of his stretches however belated it was. He stretched and used some railings to lift his legs and it was as he was completing these and standing straight that the rain started to fall.

At first it didn’t feel too heavy, the soft rain drops on his face. Sousuke looked up to the sky and closed his eyes, taking a moment to enjoy it. Yet it was only a moment that he could enjoy it. As a moment later the sky seemed to open and the rain began to fall heavily, soaking him almost instantly. He knew he’d been warned and a part of Sousuke didn’t care.

The other part of him was grumpy and wet and wondered if he could find his way back to the guest house without getting lost.

“I might as well keep going,” he said to himself, muttering under his breath.

There was no point going back just yet so Sousuke adjusted his jacket and pulled the zip up high and then began to run parallel to the ocean and the crashing waves. His pace was slow and Sousuke tried not to grimace as water seemed to want to drown him and blind him but still he continued. Or continued until he spotted something odd.

Sousuke’s eyes kept drifting towards the ocean. The waves were rolling, the white and grey and deep blues all mixing as they crashed and it was fascinating despite the whole unpleasantness of the run. And it was as he was looking towards the ocean that Sousuke noticed something.

Or more accurately someone.

During his whole run Sousuke had not seen anyone. Even when the rain hadn’t started, it seemed all the citizens of Iwatobi had more sense than Sousuke had so that they had opted to spend their evening inside where they were unlikely to be drowned. So it seemed even weirder to see someone on the beach.

Shaking his head, Sousuke wondered if he was imagining something. Maybe he already had pneumonia. He wondered what Rin’s response would be to his stupid run and then decided he didn’t want to imagine Rin’s voice in his head anymore.

He looked again and Sousuke realised he had not imagined anything and he stalled his run to a stop. As there, on the beach, close to where the water was crashing against the sand was a guy. A guy who was stood with his arms outstretched in front of the waves. Sousuke frowned and was tempted to shout out at the guy as it seemed insane to be stood on the beach in the pouring rain… but then Sousuke was stood in the pouring rain watching said guy so sanity wasn’t the best defence.

He thought he was just ready to move on, to run back the way he came (which he thought he could remember) when he saw something that made even Sousuke feel like he should intervene. The guy began to strip.

“Hey!” Sousuke shouted but his shout was unheard or ignored.

It could’ve been either – the combination of rain and waves was loud – but then Sousuke was sure he could just as easily being ignored. As stripping in front of crashing waves suggested something and Sousuke worried about the guy as the sweatshirt was thrown to the sand and he seemed to be unbuttoning jeans.

“Hey!” he shouted again but Sousuke decided it was futile from where he was so he opted to start running towards the crazy guy on the beach.

As he began his run, Sousuke watched shocked as those jeans were removed. He waved his arms, he shouted again and approached as fast as he could. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was going to do once he got the guys attention but Sousuke sure as hell knew he wasn’t going to let the guy run into the water without at least _trying_ to stop him. He knew despair, he really did. Sousuke knew what it was to live listless and without hope but he wasn’t one to sit back and watch some harm to themselves. Even in his own apathy, he wasn’t that sort of guy.

It was as he got closer that the guy finally turned and Sousuke swallowed as instead of there being skin underneath the jeans, there appeared to be swimming jammers and Sousuke suddenly realised he’d been shouting at someone who was going for a swim in the ocean.

His pace slowed and he stopped his erratic arm movements but Sousuke couldn’t really turn away now. Not when he could see that the guy in front of him was staring straight at him. Instead, he had to keep approaching. It was hardly his smoothest move and Sousuke was suddenly very glad he was never going to step foot in this damn stupid town of Iwatobi ever again.

“Is there… a problem?” the guy asked once Sousuke was near enough to hear his words.

Sousuke only wished the sand underneath his feet would swallow him up. Or maybe the ocean. Or maybe even the rain that was still pelting against his skin. He was now in front of a guy who looked about Sousuke’s age, his brownish hair plastered to his face and he was currently shirtless but wearing jammers with a green stripe down them. He had goggles and a swim cap in his hands and while it was very odd for someone to be swimming during a rain storm, Sousuke supposed the guy did just that. Maybe even on a regular basis. It may even be a thing in some towns, he guessed. He tried to articulate some words but instead his mind went blank. Especially when he was looking at the guy as Sousuke couldn’t help but notice the brightness of his eyes even in the greyish light, couldn’t stop his eyes from glancing at the strong lines of his muscles or the way he seemed to have a kind expression on his face despite Sousuke’s behaviour.

Trying to gain some sense of self and what the hell he was doing, Sousuke shook his head so that the droplets of water from his hair seemed to spray and he hoped he gained the ability to use words again.

“Ugh…” he started and he saw the guy in front of him cock his head as though trying to hear him, “I just… be careful swimming in a storm, huh?”

It was the least smooth introduction that Sousuke could’ve possibly done but it didn’t matter. He’d never see the guy again. And despite the fact the guy was very good looking, Sousuke wasn’t thinking about getting laid and he knew it was a purely fantasy thing anyway. He had no information about the guy except he was attractive and apparently liked to swim in storms. Which was hardly basis for even a one-night stand.

“I’m fine… thank you, though.”

With that the guy smiled, a smile that seemed to light up his whole face and his head bobbed and eyes closed as he did it. Sousuke wanted to say something else, maybe reiterate that it wasn’t exactly _normal_ for someone to swim in a storm but instead he just stood there as the guy put the swim cap on his head and fixed the goggles. The guy waved in Sousuke’s direction, disbanding his clothes on the sand and then began to wade into the rolling water. Sousuke watched for a few moments, the rain still falling on his skin and his brain still saying it was an insane thing to do but soon the figure was engulfed by the waves and Sousuke just had to shrug.

“I don’t even want to know what Rin would say about this. He’d probably think he was a mermaid or something.”

Sousuke chuckled softly at his own comment and then stopped when he realised _he_ sounded slightly crazy. So instead of remaining on the beach next to discarded clothes, Sousuke began his run back to his temporary accommodation and bed.

As he ran back, the rain began to slacken off and by the time he was walking aimlessly around the streets trying to remember his route back, it had stopped entirely. The night suddenly felt fresh, felt cool and Sousuke took a deep breath as he replayed his directions in his mind so that he could finally find his way back to somewhere warm.

On arriving back, it seemed Kisumi was no longer in the house or was keeping himself to himself for some reason. Sousuke didn’t care if he’d offended the guy but he was grateful for the tea and towels he was provided with by his grandmother and his little brother who were glad to see he had not got lost or drowned in the storm.

“It passed over quickly,” Sousuke said as he sipped tea as he sat on towels on the floor so as not to get any furniture wet while Hayato watched some cartoon.

It was soon the little boy’s bed time, Sousuke could see his duckling printed pyjamas and Sousuke would go to bed then. He didn’t intend to sleep but at least he could maybe chat with Rin or do some more research on his next journey. He was distracted by that thought when the grandmother spoke, her voice low.

“Storms never last long in Iwatobi. Not anymore. We are blessed. So many perished in the past.”

Sousuke looked over at the old woman then and he could see her eyes were on a set of pictures on the wall. It was the first time Sousuke had noticed them and he suddenly got a very clear idea of what the family situation was. As in those pictures were a mother and father and two boys. The boys were clearly younger Kisumi and Hayato.  And then there were ones with only the boys. Most of them featured only the boys. Sousuke understood.

“But let us not talk of the past… we are lucky now that so few people get claimed by the ocean,” she said and her eyes met Sousuke’s then.

He could see her eyes, could see the pain and unshed tears and Sousuke only looked back towards his tea. He didn’t know what to say, he had no way of comforting her so instead he unfurled his long legs and bowed in thanks towards the old woman.

“Thank you for your hospitality. I need some rest.”

“Goodnight… and it is time for you too, Hayato.”

As Sousuke walked towards his room he could hear the boy protest and demand “five more minutes” to which his grandmother laughed and Sousuke shook his head as he heard those familiar arguments. He remembered demanding the same. Always wanting to stay up longer and watch swimming competitions on VHS tapes or read books on how he could improve his technique. The memories brought with it a hint of sadness and as Sousuke closed the door, he stripped away the wet clothes until he wearing nothing.

He knew he should probably contact Rin but after the conversations downstairs and the strange meeting with the guy by the ocean, Sousuke only grabbed for a pair of black boxer briefs and then settled himself into the bed. It was too small for him and not the most comfortable, as he had discovered during his nap, but Sousuke closed his eyes and began to process the events of the day.

He fell asleep sooner than he would’ve expected but his sleep was fitful, full of dreams and his rest was in stops and starts. He dreamed of the ocean waves engulfing him, he dreamed of rain battering his skin but mostly he dreamed of green eyes gleaming through the water and a flash of a tail and claws.


	4. Chapter 4

Sousuke slept badly and woke up irritable. He was always grouchy if his sleep was disturbed but it felt even worse than usual due to the weird dreams and the cloying taste in his mouth he had. The dreams had seemed almost _too_ real and Sousuke had almost felt like he couldn’t breathe on numerous occasions and he’d woken up with his heart racing and his body covered in sweat. It was almost a relief when it was morning, when he heard the gulls calling out on the breeze and Sousuke could smell the scent of home-cooking wafting up the stairs.

Dragging himself out of the uncomfortable too small bed, Sousuke slipped out of the room to use the bathroom and shower and he checked first to see any sign of any of the inhabitants of the house. He didn’t particularly want to bump into Kisumi or anyone else. He needed to feel human again first.

Luckily no one was about, Sousuke guessed they were already eating breakfast, and so Sousuke was able to get ready in peace. He wanted to prepare himself mentally for the day and the shower, short as it was so as not to be rude, gave him opportunity to clear his head and think about what he wanted to achieve when he met with this mysterious Makoto.

After showering, Sousuke dressed simply and swiftly, his jeans loose around his waist and his shirt dark green and checked. His hair was a little damp and scruffy but Sousuke only brushed his fingers through it as he descended the stairs to find breakfast. He’d heard noise from downstairs as he was getting ready but as he walked towards the kitchen, the house seemed quiet and Sousuke wondered if was alone.

“Did you sleep well?”

Sousuke nearly jumped as the old lady appeared in the doorway, her footsteps quiet and measured.

“I did, thank you.”

He knew it was a lie, that he had not slept well at all, but he did not want to complain about that when she had been so hospitable. And it was not her fault his dreams had been so odd and disturbed… it was that stupid guy in the ocean who had done that.

“Kisumi and Hayato have already gone to school and work. I’m going to go and get some groceries. Are you planning to stay tonight?”

Sousuke’s brain for a moment had been overwhelmed by the memory of the guy in the ocean and it took him a second to respond to the old woman. He wasn’t sure if he was going to stay. He wasn’t sure if he would be finished in Iwatobi within a few hours when Makoto was again just another false hope but then he felt reluctant to be rude. So instead he nodded.

“Yes, one more night.”

The old woman smiled, the wrinkles on her face creasing gently in the morning light. “I’m going to get some fresh fish. Hope you like it.”

Smiling and explaining he did, Sousuke watched as the old woman walked towards the door to leave. Yet before she did, she turned back and looked up him and down, her eyes narrowing. “Help yourself to breakfast and… good luck with Makoto. I hope you get the answer you want.”

He didn’t answer, only watched as she walked away, leaving the small house and leaving Sousuke alone in the unfamiliar surroundings. She was obviously very trusting or maybe Sousuke was trustworthy seeming but whichever it was it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter as Sousuke didn’t do anything but help himself to breakfast and eat it slowly, his stomach feeling slightly unsettled due to what was going to happen later on.

Sousuke wondered why he was so bothered about this particular visit. He was used to his journeys giving him no results and Sousuke was more than used to disappointments. In fact, he sometimes felt like his entire existence was a disappointment. But usually he brushed off his failures as best as he could, moving on and forgetting. Yet this time he felt something different. Maybe it was the fact he was staying in this little guest house with this family which seemed… a little broken but had welcomed him in (well, maybe not Kisumi but the other’s). Or maybe it was the events of the previous night and the storm that passed but there was just something that brought a feeling of anxiety into Sousuke’s chest that he couldn’t quite describe.

So he opted to try and ignore it.

After his breakfast had been mainly picked at and much left, Sousuke cleaned up his dishes and then went back to his room. He straightened out his bed sheets which looked as though he had wrestled them and then he checked his laptop for messages. He thought about messaging Rin. Rin would be up and awake, probably training or something but Sousuke decided not to. Rin might pick up on his nerves and it would provide him with something to tease Sousuke about. He didn’t want that. Not this morning.

So instead, he checked the address that Makoto had given him and checked the route on the map on his phone. It was not far, though he guessed nowhere was far in Iwatobi, and he sat on the bed contemplating what to do with himself until his appointment.

The appointment was half an hour away and Sousuke knew that his walk would not take him very long. Sousuke didn’t want to arrive too early but also knew he couldn’t sit idly waiting so instead he got up and opted to go for a walk by the ocean now there was no longer the distraction of the pouring rain.

Iwatobi seemed a different town now that the storm had passed through. It felt cleaner, brighter and the sun was bright in sky despite the fact the summer had gone. It wasn’t cold and though Sousuke grabbed a blue hoodie, he only shrugged it over his shoulders and didn’t zip it up, he didn’t need to.

His walk took him the same route that he’d run but this time there were people about. Sousuke saw children heading to school and people heading to work and Sousuke could see the attraction of small town living. It had a charm as no one seemed to rush and instead kids seemed to be happy as they walked together. It seemed odd to Sousuke but he had grown up in city and it was even odder when people smiled in his direction and exchanged good mornings and pleasantries. Sousuke guessed that was because it was clear he was an outsider but it seemed everyone had time to say something to one another. It was very different to the morning rush hour at home where people barely made eye contact. 

The sea looked inviting now, glistening blue and Sousuke wondered if it would be warm enough for him to swim in. He doubted it was – it would be frigid despite the way the sun seemed to gleam off the rippling surface but then Sousuke remembered the insane guy from last night… surely he could give it a go tonight. Especially if it was going to be a clear night.

Sousuke tried to dawdle, tried to take him time but his body was tense and his mind was agitated and so he gave up the pretence of patience and headed towards Makoto’s home. He checked his phone to ensure he was heading in the direction and then walked with purposeful strides in the direction of the property.

He knew he had an appointment but Sousuke had found that the people he had dealt with so far were often not exactly the greatest time-keepers or exactly conventional. It was hardly seeing a doctor in a clean white room and sometimes it was the very opposite. And the worst thing that could happen would be that Sousuke was made to wait. He could manage that. He had been waiting long enough for something to help his injured shoulder.

Knowing he was on the right route, Sousuke soon found the house and he stopped in front of it, cocking his head slightly. It looked normal and like a family home. It had a small garden in front with flowers and grass and Sousuke stepped towards the door, his feet suddenly dragging.

He should give up. Sousuke knew that. His shoulder was not going to get better. It was futile and it was stupid and it was like clinging onto some stupid childhood dream. It was like those kids who said they wanted to be fireman or astronauts or policemen. It was something that was so entirely improbable that it was unlikely ever to happen. And Sousuke was sure he would’ve given up on the professional swimming career entirely if not for Rin.

His doubts clouded his mind for a moment but then Sousuke brushed them aside. He couldn’t get this _close_ and then turn away. That was stupider than not trying in the first place so Sousuke screwed up his courage and knocked on the door, rattling his knuckles against the wood twice.

It was as his fist was about to hit the door for the last time that it opened swiftly, yanked hard in and Sousuke nearly lost his balance due to the swiftness of the move. A second later he regained his balance and looked ahead to see no one had opened the door. Or so he thought until he looked down and saw a boy in a school uniform and just behind him a girl in a similar uniform who was hopping around trying to put shoes on, her attempt failing.

“Hurry!” the little boy said and Sousuke couldn’t help the puzzled look on his face. He wanted to double check the address, wanted to ensure he hadn’t got lost but instead the boy looked up at him and then spoke. “Are you here to see Makoto?”

Sousuke nodded, dumbstruck for a second.

“Your appointment’s here!” the boy shouted and Sousuke observed the girl had finally managed to get her shoes on her feet, the hopping ceasing.

A voice called back “okay”, low and soothing despite the chaos of the two children. As Sousuke looked, he was pretty sure they were twins, too alike in age and looks to be anything but and he had to stand back as they bounded out of the door, their bodies brushing Sousuke’s as they left. “Hey! You’re forgetting your lunches!”

Sousuke backed off this time to avoid flailing limbs as the pair ran back in the house and then back out of the door, food apparently obtained. Having not had a younger sibling, Sousuke could only stare at the energy until he remembered how he and Rin had been when they’d been a similar age. Everything had been a race. Everything had been about competition. Everything had been about their dream.

Tch. That dream long gone.

Sousuke watched for a second as the twins left and it wasn’t until he heard a voice did he turn back towards the door.

“Sorry… morning can be a little chaotic. My parents are out of town visiting relatives and so it’s only me and them so…”

The voice. The voice was familiar and Sousuke knew who it was before he met the eyes of Makoto, the Makoto who was going to help him and maybe cure his injured shoulder. Makoto who was called the heart of Iwatobi.

As the guy standing in the doorway was about Sousuke own age. He had light brown hair, ruffled by the hand that was running through it and he smiled brightly, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he did. Sousuke stared for a moment as he had already met Makoto. And suddenly his heart sunk.

This guy couldn’t help him, this guy who was insane enough to swim in the ocean in a storm and Sousuke was about to back away when he felt the touch of a hand on his arm. It was a gentle touch, a touch that was not firm and barely more than a brief contact felt through layers of material but there was something about it. And more importantly there was _something_ about Makoto.

“Come in, Sousuke… let me see if I can help you.”

The contact was broken, a warm feeling left in its place through shirt and hoodie, but Sousuke only nodded. He had come this far… he needed to go in. He needed to know more. He needed to know if Makoto could help him at all. 


	5. Chapter 5

Sousuke had visited some odd and strange places in his quest to find some kind of cure for his shoulder. Many of them had been unconventional and he had taken everything in his stride. He, after all, was looking for something out of the realms of the ordinary so he couldn’t expect to find in an ordinary place. However, as he stepped into Makoto’s home it was so completely ordinary that it was startling.

As he removed his shoes, Sousuke could see the family pictures that lined the walls and he could see Makoto at various ages alongside the twins and a pair of beaming parents who seemed inordinately proud of their offspring. It was all so average that Sousuke’s doubts seem to resurface that had been alleviated by the brief touch of Makoto’s hand. How could someone who had come from something so ordinary, so average, so dull be able to help Sousuke? He couldn’t see it but he had to give Makoto at least a small amount of time to prove Sousuke’s doubts correct. Or do _something_ to help. Either one.

Makoto waved his hand towards a doorway once Sousuke’s shoes were removed. “You can wait in the living room while I prepare everything… feel free to watch TV.”

“Thanks,” Sousuke mumbled in response and he walked into the room.

The television was still on and there were traces of family life all over the room. A cartoon played on the television, toys, books and stickers seemed to litter each surface and Sousuke could even see a half forgotten cup of tea steaming on a coffee table. Sousuke took it all in before he took a seat on the couch and reached for the remote to turn off the television. It seemed to be a show about an animated cat and Sousuke knew he could just change the channel but instead he opted for silence as he waited for Makoto.

He tried to remain calm and collected but Sousuke was finding it difficult. He fidgeted on the couch and grabbed for his phone a few times, checking for something and nothing at the same time. He didn’t like waiting despite how often he’d done it and so Sousuke found his foot bouncing up and down on the carpeted floor as he waited.

Makoto didn’t keep him waiting long and Sousuke was grateful when he appeared in the doorway, a large smile on his face that Sousuke guessed was meant to be welcoming. He had looked a little stressed when Sousuke had first arrived, not that Sousuke could blame him when he looked after those two twins alone, but now he seemed a very image of peace. The angel thought resurfaced in his head and Sousuke tried to shake it out before it lodged itself in his brain.

“You can come through, Sousuke.”

Getting to his feet, Sousuke followed Makoto up the stairs and to a room. As he ascended the stairs, Sousuke smelled incense and he took a deep drag of the scent. It was something that smelled fresh – that smelled like running water and Sousuke was reminded of his dream of drowning. It was only a brief memory but Sousuke’s breath caught for a second and he felt confused at the sharpness of the memory. It had been a dream, after all, nothing more than that…

His thoughts, annoying and rampant as they were, were soon stalled all together as Makoto led him into the room and Sousuke couldn’t help be a little surprised at where his consultation was. He had assumed that Makoto must have a particular room to see his patients or clients or whatever he called them but then when Sousuke _really_ thought about, he thought this was unlikely. So instead of a consultation room, Sousuke was led into what was clearly Makoto’s bedroom. He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised considering he was in an ordinary family home yet still it made Sousuke feel off-kilter as he entered the room that smelt of water.

The room must’ve been Makoto’s for a long time as Sousuke could see traces of boyhood Makoto on the bookcase – comics and collectables on the shelves. On the doorway as he entered Sousuke could even see pencil marks and the height written alongside an age.  Yes, he sure, this had been Makoto’s boyhood room.

In preparation for Sousuke, it seemed Makoto had done a few things in his room. The main one being pulling a screen across a part of the room to obscure what Sousuke assumed was his bed. Sousuke wasn’t entirely sure it was necessary but maybe it felt more professional that way. As in the middle of the room, Makoto had set two chairs, one old and wooden and the other brown leather and somewhat worn by use and age. And in the brown leather one sat a black cat.

“Ugh… take a seat Sousuke. I’ll move her…”

Makoto walked towards the chair and picked up the cat before putting it on the floor. However, the cat didn’t seem to want to leave the chair and hopped straight back up.

“It’s fine. I’ll sit with the cat,” Sousuke said as he watched Makoto try to move her again, unsuccessfully.

“You don’t have to…” Makoto said, “she’s just stubborn.”

Sousuke gave a shrug. “I am too. We’ll get along.”

A soft laugh escaped Makoto’s lips. “Fine… though she’s a cuddler. You’ve been warned.”

The warning was very true. Makoto picked the cat up one final time, who was called Jiji, and Sousuke sat only to have her settle in his lap straight away. Sousuke liked cats and he found the presence of the animal to be soothing, he stroked his hand along the soft black fur as Makoto seemed to regain his composure, picking up a few items from the side before he took a seat on the chair opposite. One of the items, he collected was a pair of black rimmed glasses which he put on, before he looked down at a pad of paper that appeared to have some notes on it.

Sousuke wasn’t quite sure how it was meant to work. Indeed, everyone he had encountered so far had been different so Sousuke just remained quiet as he followed Makoto’s lead. He did want to speak – did want to ask Makoto about his storm-swim but instead he focused on Jiji and the fresh smell of water that no longer felt like it was drowning him. Instead it felt soothing. He wondered if that had been the point.

“So… Sousuke. It was a sporting injury, correct?”

The question was simple and Sousuke nodded. “My shoulder. I swim butterfly. Was meant to be able to go pro but…”

Sousuke knew he could explain more. He could explain the pain and how he’d tried to continue despite it. How he’d crashed and burned and found all his hopes and dreams broken on the floor. Yet he wasn’t in self-pitying mood and instead he only looked towards Makoto who nodded, his face sympathetic, his eyes seeming to shine.

“You only need to tell me what I need to know.”

“There’s not a lot to tell really. I’ve had physio, scans and more doctor’s appointments than I can count. There was nothing they could do… so I gave up. Until Rin told me to stop being an asshole about it and find some other way of getting better…”

Makoto nodded sympathetically and then paused prior to asking his next question. “Who’s Rin?”

“Ahh… Rin’s my best friend… we had this dream of going pro together and swimming together at the Olympics. Pretty stupid, huh?” Makoto didn’t indicate if he thought the dream was stupid, instead all he did was look at Sousuke through those thick rimmed glasses. “And now he’s getting his dream with this Nanase guy and I’m…left behind.”

The words all seemed to go come in a rush and Sousuke wasn’t sure what had prompted such a series of revelations. Sousuke was hardly the most friendly or sociable guy. Rin always referred to him as a “grumpy bastard” and whenever they had attended parties or events as they got older, Rin had always ensured that Sousuke drank plentiful beers as apparently being a little bit tipsy made Sousuke more approachable and less scary to those that did not know him. He really didn’t know why he’d said so much to Makoto and Sousuke looked down to Jiji the cat rather than at the intense green eyes as he waited for a response.

The response was a sigh and Sousuke looked up at that as he saw Makoto looking towards the window of his bedroom, his expression wistful. “I understand that feeling… being left behind.” Makoto turned then, smiled and a soft laugh escaped those lips. “Sorry… this is about you, not me.”

Sousuke wanted to say that he didn’t mind, that in fact, he was a little curious about Makoto but he didn’t get chance. As Makoto asked him a question that made his face flush a bright red.

“Can you take off your shirt?”

“Uh…” Sousuke managed to say, the inarticulate words mumbled out. He knew, logically, that most healers wanted to actually _see_ the injury but there was something about Makoto that had made him forget a little why he was here. He wasn’t sure why he was so damn flustered but Sousuke regained some sense. “I mean, sure. Of course.”

“I can give you some privacy…” Makoto offered but Sousuke shook his head.

“No… I just might have to disturb your cat.”

He did have to, it seemed, as even the slightest movement had alerted Jiji to the fact her comfortable perch had been compromised. She jumped off Sousuke’s lap elegantly and sauntered off out of Makoto’s bedroom leaving the two of them alone. Getting to his feet, Sousuke shrugged off the hoodie he’d not bothered to zip up and then started to unbutton his shirt. It seemed to take a long time and Makoto had got up from his seat and seemed to be checking his collection of books rather than look over at Sousuke. His shirt removed, Sousuke took off the black tank top he wore underneath and he coughed to gain Makoto’s attention once again.

“May I… touch?”

“Sure,” Sousuke answered, his voice croaky for some reason he wasn’t entirely sure of.

He was more than used to strangers poking and prodding him, used to people massaging his shoulder, used to having foul smelling creams applied to it and even once someone had sung some chant at his injury. Yet this felt different when Makoto approached and instructed him to turn around.

“I’m not going to do anything but touch you… okay?”

Sousuke grunted his consent, not sure if his voice would shake more when he knew Makoto was so close and his hands were poised to touch. He tried to focus his eyes on the wall, on a poster, on the spine of a book but that was not effective so instead he chose to close his eyes and take a few deep breaths as he felt the contact of fingers.

The touch was gentle, a whisper and Sousuke let a breath he wasn’t aware he was holding out as Makoto’s fingers pressed into his skin. It was nothing… just a touch and Sousuke was sure it was not going to do anything. That Makoto was not going to be able to heal him.

Then his stomach jolted, a subtle jolt as a flat of a palm rested against his skin and then suddenly Sousuke felt a wave wash over him. It wasn’t just an imagined wave, it was as though he was by the shore and he had been engulfed by the water unexpectedly. He had opened his mouth due to the shock and he swallowed water, it flooding his lungs and Sousuke panicked as it was like the dream he’d had last night. The dreams of drowning.

He tried to swim, tried to move but he felt leaden, his eyes blinded by salted water and stinging. He saw light above him but it was too far away and Sousuke wasn’t able to reach it. Yet he saw, even in the gloom green eyes and claws and he thought he saw others… others drowning in the water…

Disorientated, Sousuke realised he was on his knees. It took a second to understand, to comprehend but Sousuke became rapidly aware that he was on the floor of Makoto’s room and he took deep glugs of air as he tried to understand the events of the past few seconds.

Makoto was out of his vision but Sousuke could hear the word “sorry” being repeated and Sousuke was beyond confused. Shakily, Sousuke tried to get to his feet yet his balance was off and he only seemed to shake. He felt cold, bone-chillingly cold and so he felt for the chair where he had sat knowing his clothing was there.

He didn’t bother with his shirt and tank, Sousuke only grabbed for the hoodie as he knew his shaking fingers could handle the zipper. On completing that task, Sousuke pulled himself to his feet and finally his eyes met Makoto’s.

Makoto’s eyes were wide with shock, his expression as confused as Sousuke. “I didn’t mean… I don’t understand… sorry…”

Not sure what to say, Sousuke only grabbed for the rest of his clothes and walked with purpose out of the room and towards the exit of the house. Makoto followed, a few beats behind but Sousuke threw a look over his shoulder.

“I’ll send your money… I don’t think you can help me.”

Makoto didn’t follow him then as Sousuke fumbled with his shoes, finally deciding he’d just carry them until his body started reacting “normally” and it was a relief when he was outside in the warm autumn air of Iwatobi. He left, his socked feet on the hard ground and he only briefly turned back towards the house to see Makoto was looking  out of window, Jiji in his arms and Sousuke shook his head.

He didn’t know exactly what the hell had happened but one thing was for sure. Makoto couldn’t help him.


	6. Chapter 6

He couldn’t explain it. And Sousuke wasn’t one for the unexplainable. He was a practical guy and wasn’t one for spiritual and things that he could not see. Yeah, during his path to heal he had come across people who thought they could heal him with their mind or whatever but he had always taken their promises with a healthy dose of cynicism and thus had come out of the experience feeling neither cheated nor disappointed.

Yet this was not like that. Makoto had not told him he was going to do anything… like he had done. It had only happened. It had also seemed somewhat shocking to Makoto. Sousuke wasn’t sure what the hell to think but all he wanted to do was get out of Iwatobi and away from that feeling of drowning.  

After walking far enough away from the house, Sousuke paused and thought about putting his sneakers back on. He looked down to see his white socks were definitely no longer white and wondered if anyone had spotted him and thought him odd as he walked. Shaking his head to wipe away thoughts of being a “weird outsider”, Sousuke looked to see he had made his way back to the ocean unintentionally. He supposed Iwatobi wasn’t big – most roads led back to the water – but it seemed he was irresistibly drawn to it.

Walking the rest of the way to the beach, Sousuke removed his socks and rolled up the bottom of his jeans. He stepped onto the sand and let his toes dig into the grains underneath. The breeze was light and rustled his hair and Sousuke felt calm once again. It was as though Makoto’s room was a fading memory – something that happened to him long ago – and he was started to feel the familiar sting of failure. Or another venture that had come to nothing.

Maybe it was time to give up, Sousuke pondered as he walked towards the water’s edge, digging his toes into the sand as he walked as though to stabilise him in the moment. He was fooling himself and it was time to start thinking of an actual future  - not some childish dream. Sighing, he reached the water and walked into the rolling tide, his feet soon covered by the cold sea.

He walked, the water lapping around his ankles and he stopped occasionally to pick a stone up and attempt to skim it across the water. It was difficult as the waves kept rolling but a few times he got it to bounce before it descended under the waves below.

The walk gave Sousuke time to process and he soon came to the conclusion that during his time in Makoto’s room he had simply become confused and had become faint and dizzy. The room _had_ been hot, after all, and the smell of the incense had been intense. The smell had been similar to water and so he had to figure that is why he’d thought he was drowning when he’d passed out. After all, he had dreamed about drowning the previous night. And Sousuke had often had dreams about drowning during his life. He guessed it was a part of being in the water so much. So by the time he had finished his walk along the beach and wriggled his damp and sandy feet into his sneakers, Sousuke was not as vehement about leaving Iwatobi straight away. He didn’t want to be rude to his hosts.

Indeed, he wasn’t rude to his hosts at all. Instead, Sousuke offered his help and soon found himself being given chores by the old woman while her grandsons attended school and work respectively.

She asked, of course, she asked but Sousuke kept his answer short and to the point.

“Makoto couldn’t help me.”

The old woman had nodded and instructed Sousuke to chop some vegetables as finely as he could for the broth.

As Sousuke helped in small tasks, including dusting a particularly high cabinet, he soon began to wonder if Makoto had helped him in some odd way. As without Makoto, he perhaps would’ve gone to the next healer and the next and the next… And he wouldn’t have started to think about a future without swimming in it. He was coming to realise following Rin around was not his life. Plus Rin had Nanase and the Olympic dream. Sousuke wasn’t a part of that. He could watch, he cold spectate… but he couldn’t participate. He needed to find a new angle for his life.

Once Hayato had arrived home, Sousuke ended up playing a video game with the boy and he relaxed in a way that he hadn’t done for years. He couldn’t describe what had happened, couldn’t figure it out but instead of the knot of anxiety in his stomach about his shoulder and his wrecked swimming career, Sousuke felt… nothing. There was just relief.

Sousuke excused himself from Hayato briefly and went back to the room he was staying in for one final night. He opened up his laptop and checked his email, unsurprised to see the content in his inbox. Of course, there was the usual spam and sales stuff from various companies he had ordered from in the past. Yet there was also one from Rin. And Makoto.

He opted to deal with the spam and junk, deleting them until he arrived at Rin’s. Rin’s was the same encouraging bluster it always way. It was meant to be heartening, Sousuke supposed, but he just felt a slight sickness when he thought of his friend.

Rin would think he had given up. Rin would probably think he was a quitter. How could he make his friend understand that he couldn’t keep living on his false hope? He wasn’t sure.

Scowling darkly, he opted not to answer it and instead opened Makoto’s.  It was an apology as Sousuke expected. It reiterated that Makoto didn’t know what happened and usually his “healing” did not cause any side effects. Sousuke couldn’t help his scowl becoming a frown as he thought of the guy he had sat with a scant few hours ago. The apology asked him to meet Makoto by the water at 9pm and Sousuke didn’t know what to think of that. Biting at his lip, Sousuke closed the screen of his laptop without closing down the machine and went to look out of the window.

If he met Makoto, Sousuke could ask him what was in the incense and what Makoto had done if anything. He was _curious_. But on the other hand, he didn’t care. He was going to leave Iwatobi on the morning and was never coming back. It didn’t matter. He could just forget it as part of his wacky journey into experimental healing processes and go back home to start considering the next step of his career.

“Huh,” he mumbled to himself, “at least this might make an interesting paragraph in my autobiography.”

He leaned against the window, his head pressing against the smooth glass thinking of how he could write down all his ridiculous experiences and he was close to making a decision. It couldn’t hurt to meet Makoto, he supposed, and plus he could confront him about whether his reaction was due to something in the incense. He also could pay him the money that had remained in his wallet as he had forgotten something so mundane in the whole weird encounter.

It was then he heard heavy footsteps on the stairs and a moment later there was a loud knock on the door with small hands.

“Come in,” Sousuke said softly and he turned towards the doorway to see the boy stood in it.

“Grandmother says dinner is ready.”

With a nod, Sousuke followed Hayato down the stairs. Kisumi was already sat, already eating and occasionally casting his eye on his phone that was set on the table. And despite the appearance that Kisumi was trying to convey, Sousuke kept feeling at though he was looking in his direction as though he was trying to figure out what had happened during his appointment. Sousuke didn’t give anything away and the meal passed in calm and silence.

It was only when Sousuke offered to wash dishes and Kisumi volunteered too did Sousuke find himself asked more invasive questions about Makoto.

“Are you cured?” Kisumi asked, his tone smug.

Sousuke grunted as he put his hands in sudsy water. “No.”

“So the great ‘Heart of Iwatobi’ did nothing? Just used you… like he uses everyone. False hope. Broken promises.”

Not sure how to respond, Sousuke shrugged. He wasn’t sure why but Kisumi still made him feel on edge and disorientated. It was something about his eyes, his unsettling knowing smirk and his “secret” knowledge of Makoto that made Sousuke want to ask a number of questions. Then a part of him didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of asking. And really, it didn’t matter, he was leaving tomorrow.

They passed the rest of the chore in silence, a few glances in each other’s directions and Sousuke could see that Kisumi was clearly upset about something. Rin had always called Sousuke “emotionally stunted” as he often found it tricky to read people’s emotions or be fully willing to show his own, but he could see that Kisumi was not happy. He knew that much. He thought of Rin and his emotions – always at the surface and ready to bubble over at the slightest moment – and wondered if Kisumi was like that.

“What did… Makoto do to you?” Sousuke asked, his voice low and deep.

Sousuke almost thought he hadn’t said the words. He wasn’t sure why exactly it _mattered_ or why he wanted to know but he supposed he wanted some reason as to why he was so bothered about the whole encounter with the green eyed man rather than forgetting it immediately after the “healing” had failed.

“Nothing,” Kisumi said bitterly, putting down the dish towel he had been drying a bowl with and giving a sad smile in Sousuke’s direction, “that was the problem.”

Without another word Kisumi left the kitchen and Sousuke heard him leave the house a scant few moments later. Puzzled, Sousuke leaned against the counter, his head feeling heavy from the day and all the thoughts that were spinning around his head.  

“He blames him.”

The voice from behind Sousuke made him jump. He hadn’t heard the old woman enter the kitchen and he turned towards her.

“What for?”

“For the death of his parents,” she answered.

The answer was not what Sousuke expected. The old woman smiled sadly as she obviously saw the confusion on Sousuke’s face.

“Maybe you should ask Makoto about that.”

He nodded, only the slightest nod of his head and the old woman departed the kitchen leaving Sousuke alone with even more confusing thoughts. The new information was puzzling and Sousuke _really_ wasn’t sure what to think about it or Makoto or the town of Iwatobi but he did know one thing. That he would definitely meet Makoto this evening.

Sousuke needed some closure from his unusual excursion in Iwatobi.


	7. Chapter 7

Sousuke couldn’t stay in the house. He tried to. He really did. After all, he didn’t know anyone else in Iwatobi apart from Makoto and his hosts and so he had nowhere else to go. And he had run and seen the entirety of the town in his brief stay. But still, Sousuke couldn’t just sit. As he tried to wait, sat on the too small bed, he found his knee jerking and his fingers tapping a rhythm against his thigh and he realised he needed to expel some of his pent up energy. He didn’t want to run again so he didn’t bother changing into his exercise clothes. Instead he just walked.

The walk did little to ease Sousuke’s anxiety yet at least it felt better than sitting. Iwatobi truly was a beautiful place and Sousuke wished he could enjoy it properly. Maybe one day he would come back. He almost chuckled to himself. He had never returned to any of the places he had travelled to on his adventures and this would not be the first. It had hardly been the most fun experience.

The evening was beautiful, the sun low in the sky and Sousuke took deep breaths of the salty air. It wasn’t like the city, the sound of traffic and people didn’t rattle around his skull and instead he could almost constantly hear the waves. Checking his phone, Sousuke saw that it was nearly time to meet Makoto so he shoved his phone back in his back pocket and walked in that direction with a slow and steady swagger.

As he approached the beach, Sousuke could see a few people were walking and he could see a few dogs with lolling heads running along the sand. It seemed a beautiful evening for such a thing. Sousuke guessed if he ever moved to near the ocean, he would want a dog to walk as it would mean he was forced to appreciate the sea every day. He’d like one now but Sousuke didn’t think it was fair to confine the animal in the city. It didn’t seem right.

It was then he realised that Makoto was already there. And he was under the impression that Makoto had been there a while. He was sat on the beach, Sousuke could see, and he had his jeans rolled up to his calves and his feet were buried in the sand. There were divots made in the sand by fingers and Sousuke guessed Makoto had been somewhat anxious himself. Makoto looked up as Sousuke approached and he got to his feet, wiping the sand from his hands on his denim clad thighs. He cocked his head to the side and smiled, his eyes closing slightly and Sousuke noticed the way his whole face seemed to come alight when he did such a simple gesture and expression. He wasn’t sure what the hell it was but Sousuke’s skin seemed to tingle as he drew close and he almost wanted to curse himself for the rolling feeling in his stomach. He wanted to believe it was nerves as their previous encounter had not exactly been successful but Sousuke knew it was something else.

As Rin would say, he really needed to get laid. Or at least a blow job. Or something. That was why his body was reacting to Makoto. Nothing more than some deep lustful thought that he was trying to quash due to the time it had been since he’d rolled around in bed with someone. Hormones, sometimes, were a bitch.

Makoto offered his hand and Sousuke looked at it, unsure whether the take it.

“Oh sorry,” Makoto said as he wiped the sand away again, an attempt that seemed just as unsuccessful as the first. “I didn’t think you’d come.”

Sousuke shrugged. “I didn’t really know either.”

“Well… I guess we should walk, huh?”

Brows knitting together, Sousuke wasn’t sure what to say to that, but Makoto was already starting to walk away. He looked back, those green eyes seeming to shine in the early evening light and he gave an apologetic grin. “I have something to show you.”

For a second, Sousuke thought that following Makoto was a bad idea. Maybe the whole weird experience of drowning would re-occur and kill him this time. And it was clear that Kisumi blamed Makoto for _something_ involving his parent’s death. Yet Makoto didn’t seem like the sort of guy who would murder him with a shovel and bury him somewhere where no one would find him. So Sousuke followed. He thought briefly about texting Rin, about telling him that he would text him later so that if something happened… but then he stopped the idea. There was nothing dangerous about Makoto. He was sure of it. And when Makoto looked around with another smile, Sousuke was even more positive that he was safe in Makoto’s oddly calm presence.  

Makoto walked in front and Sousuke soon realised he was being led somewhere he had not been to in Iwatobi. And he also realised how tight the light long sleeved t-shirt was on Makoto and how it seemed to cling to the muscles of his back and then finish where the curve of his ass looked perfect in jeans…

‘You really need to get laid,’ he thought, annoyed at his libido and wandering thoughts.

It was not helping his current situation and Sousuke wondered if there was more to this attraction to Makoto than his recent lack of sex life. Sousuke wasn’t usually the sort for these lustful feelings instantly unless there was a fruity alcoholic drink that Rin had bought him multiple glasses of in his hand.  And then he was rarely a “love at first sight” kinda guy. Rin was the romantic one. Sousuke needed more time. He always needed more time…

Makoto started up a set of stone steps and Sousuke followed a step behind, his strides as long as Makoto’s. They were a match physically and that was a rare thing in itself. Sousuke was able to keep pace with Makoto without over-taking him and without getting out of breath. They would be good running partners, Sousuke summarised. And if his shoulder was ever healed, they would probably be good at swimming together. Yet that thought only brought a twinge back to his aching muscles and he rubbed at it briefly.

At that moment, Makoto looked back, a look of concern on his face. “Are you okay?”

Sousuke’s brows knitted together at the question. Makoto had been looking forward when he had touched his shoulder – why had Makoto asked the question? Or was it just that Makoto was worried about his physical prowess so much that he thought that Sousuke couldn’t handle a handful of steps?

Shaking his head, Sousuke grunted out a “fine” through gritted teeth and they continued up.

There were not many more steps but in the short walk from the beach, the air had started to feel cooler. Sousuke zipped up his teal hoodie as they finished their ascent and he looked back to see the ocean and the town below.

It all looked toy like – small and Sousuke scanned it all and then looked out towards the sea and horizon. He could see the fishing boats sailing out for the night and Sousuke watched the white trails that cut a path through the blue as the sky started to darken further. Above the sky was a dark twilight blue and Sousuke could see stars. Looking back towards Makoto, Sousuke realised what this place was.

Makoto had walked towards a rock with lettering inscribed into and he was kneeing as he pulled up stray grass and weeds from around the base of it. Sousuke walked softly towards the rock, his feet making little noise out of a sign of respect.

“These are all the people that have been killed by storms in Iwatobi over the last fifty years,” Makoto said solemnly as his long fingers touched at the carved names and dates in the stone.

Sousuke scanned them, his eyes taking in them without them meaning much to him but Sousuke supposed in a town as small as Iwatobi that most of these people would be familiar to the residents of the town. Of course he saw the one familiar name. Kisumi and Hayato’s parents. They appeared to one of the last deaths carved into the rock, only one more death and date were below those two names.

Kneeling down beside Makoto, Sousuke helped with the task of tidying around stone, some way of showing his respect for the dead. Maybe it was because of Kisumi and his attitude. Or maybe it was more because of Hayato. Whatever he did so with care and in silence, the only noise the occasional sea bird flying over-head.

Yet as it didn’t take long to tidy up, Sousuke soon felt awkward and unsure what he was doing with Makoto and his tongue felt big in his mouth as he tried to word what he wanted to ask Makoto. He had never been known to be sensitive and he had often said things before he thought about them throughout his young life. He had hurt Rin immeasurably regarding relays. Sometimes he wondered if Rin had ever _truly_ forgiven him for saying they were stupid when they were Rin’s way of holding onto the memory of his deceased father. Sousuke wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t.

“There’s… no names for a long time,” Sousuke said finally, his fingers brushing at that last name. The date was ten years ago.

Makoto smiled. “Would you believe me if I said… that was because of me?”

Sousuke looked at Makoto then, looked at the smile before he reconciled the words that had come out of Makoto’s mouth.

“No,” Sousuke said, his voice gruff, “I wouldn’t.”

A soft laugh was in answer and Makoto got to his feet then. Sousuke followed suit and watched as Makoto walked to look down at the ocean and the town below. He could see the way the breeze ruffled at Makoto’s hair and see how Makoto’s hand were stuffed in the pockets of his jeans.

There had things Sousuke might’ve expected Makoto to say. To tell Sousuke that he had given him some drug as a trick to try and make himself healed. Or something like that. Yet he hadn’t expected him to say that he had stop people being killed by storms for ten years. That seemed far-fetched.

Sousuke would’ve been happier to find out that Makoto was a fraud and had attempted to take his money without remorse. Not that he was clearly not completely…well, sane.

“You’ve heard my nickname, I bet? The Heart of Iwatobi?”

Nodding was the only response Sousuke gave to that and Makoto smiled again.

“I get that you’re a rational guy and this all seems crazy… you never believed that I could heal you, did you?”

Sousuke shrugged. “I guess I hoped…”

Makoto shook his head. “You never believed though?” he pressed.

“No,” Sousuke answered abruptly, not daring to look at Makoto’s green eyes, “but I wanted to try one more time.”

“You won’t believe any of this, I’m sure, but I could explain who I am and _what_ I am and how I maybe… maybe I could heal you, if you gave me the chance…”

Remaining silent, Sousuke looked back out to sea and watched a seagull fly overhead, its wings beating lazily on the breeze. Makoto sounded wistful, even maybe sad and Sousuke couldn’t figure out _why_ he felt sorry for the guy. After all, he was the one with the fucked up shoulder and the wrecked career and the life that was heading into the gutter.

“Explain,” Sousuke said softly and Makoto’s smiled again, his eyes crinkling up in the corners and his head cocking to one side as it had done before.

“Sousuke…  I can do a kinda… magic.”

If Sousuke had expected something, it was definitely not _that._

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please note that the rating has gone up to explicit and "masturbation" has been added as a tag.

Magic. Sousuke almost laughed. Magic sounded like something childish. Something seen in bright kids television shows and movies with talking animals in them. Magic wasn’t _real_.

“You think I’m crazy, right?” Makoto asked, his voice wavering slightly then, the humour and confidence obviously starting to fade in the light of Sousuke’s stony faced expression.

“I don’t know what I think,” Sousuke replied, his jaw remaining set and his arms folded across his chest.

“Okay,” Makoto started then stalled. Sousuke watched as he ran fingers through that soft looking hair and Sousuke swallowed as he watched those strong hands. Makoto took a deep breath and made sure his eyes were looking towards sea rather than at Sousuke. “When I was a kid there was this story about Iwatobi… about this man who lost his wife to the ocean during a freak storm and from that day on grieved every day from the loss. Seeing his grief, some… spirit of the ocean approached him and offered him a chance to make sure no one ever experienced his grief again. He was given this… power so that he could control storms and the ocean and be able to stop anyone in the town from drowning. He lived a long life and no one died during that time. He was called the Heart of Iwatobi and when he died… his power passed on.”

“So no one drowns in Iwatobi?”

Makoto shook his head. “No… it can happen. But the Heart of Iwatobi has the power to protect the town and its people.”

“So you are who this power was passed down to?”

Sousuke asked the question as though it was perfectly rational even though his mind was thinking how completely and utterly delusional Makoto was. He didn’t let his feelings show on his face, his expression stoic and arms folded across his chest. He knew he just had to finish listening to Makoto’s piece and then he could leave and return to the guest house. And from there he could return home to Tokyo and forget about the whole mess.

“No,” Makoto said with a small laugh, “there have been plenty other people before me. I am just the last in long line… a good friend of mine, this old man…” Makoto’s voice drifted off again and Sousuke could hear the sadness, “he was the last one before me to have the power. He died trying to protect the town. Many people died that night. I was eight.”

“Eight?”

Makoto nodded. “One morning I was a normal boy growing up in Iwatobi. The next day I woke up and felt… different. I could do and see things differently. I constantly felt like I was treading water, that I was drowning… it took a long time to control it. To be able to use it for good. To help people.”

The night was darkening as Makoto talked and in hearing the despair in his voice, Sousuke felt a tug of sympathy deep in his gut. This _hurt_ Makoto to talk about. And it made sense. To be handed such a huge responsibility so young… Then Sousuke shook himself mentally. None of this was real. This whole town just had some superstitions due to its isolation. Makoto was not… magic. Maybe he thought he was, and Sousuke was pretty sure that Makoto thought he was genuine, but that didn’t matter. None of it was real. It was a story made up that had grown a life of its own.

“It was hard… there was so much pressure and so many lives at stake. And sometimes I didn’t succeed…”

The words hung in the air and Sousuke felt a chill from his very core that made him shiver. Was one of those failures Kisumi’s parents? That a young Makoto couldn’t use this “power” correctly and so Kisumi blamed him? It all seemed insane. And Sousuke had heard enough. He wanted reality. He wanted booze and he wanted the gym and he wanted his own bed in his parent’s house. He wanted to forget this ever happened and return to his normal life. He wanted to return to a world where there was no magic and no miracles. He didn’t want to believe any of Makoto’s story. No matter how sincere it sounded.

“But now… I can help… it’s my purpose in life.”

It was then Makoto reached for Sousuke again and Sousuke immediately stiffened. He had stood by while Makoto spoke but only out of some sort of respect. It wasn’t because he believed. It wasn’t because he was waiting for Makoto to help… Sousuke wasn’t exactly sure why he’d stayed but he jerked back at the attempted touch.

“You can’t,” Sousuke said, his voice low and his eyes looking at the gravelled path below, “I don’t…”

“You don’t believe?”

Sousuke looked up and met Makoto’s eyes. They weren’t angry, they weren’t upset but they seemed to glow with an intensity that seemed almost unnatural. They were so damn green that Sousuke felt when he stared into them he was seeing light as though filtered by a forest canopy… he stepped back, annoyed at the stupid jumbled thoughts in his head. The thoughts that Makoto was creating.

“This is a kid’s story… I thought you’d be able to enlighten me. Help me. But all you’re doing is telling me story. I don’t have time for this… I don’t want your help. Not now… not ever.”

Makoto looked crestfallen and Sousuke couldn’t understand why. But a moment later, Makoto schooled his features into a more neutral expression and nodded slightly.

“Here,” Sousuke offered, his hand getting his wallet out from his back pocket and starting to produce cash but Makoto shook his head.

“I don’t want your money. I didn’t help you. I don’t deserve it.”

They stood for a moment at an impasse. It was almost as though they were poised on the verge of a battle or maybe just in some form of staring contest. Time trickled away, the breeze blowing hair into their eyes and Sousuke heard again those mournful sounding seagulls. Sousuke shoved his wallet back inside his pocket and offered a half-hearted wave before he began to descend the stairs back into the town. His walk was slow, not out of fear of falling, but because his stomach felt leaden. He turned back a few times to see that Makoto was still stood where he had been, his gaze looking out to sea and Sousuke tried to shrug off the feeling of melancholy that had infected him.

This whole thing he had been drawn into was not his problem. It wasn’t his problem that maybe Makoto needed some counselling or _something._ Yet he couldn’t help feeling the sting of leaving things as they were and Sousuke felt each step heavily as he walked back to the guesthouse.

It started to rain as he walked and Sousuke felt each light droplet on his skin. It felt _different_ , it felt like tears and he banished the thought from his head as quickly as it had arrived. Sousuke didn’t think like this usually. Rin was the romantic one in their friendship. He wrote letters and poetry. Certainly not Sousuke.

When he arrived back at the guesthouse, he saw flickering light through the window despite the late hour. How long had he been out? The time now was past ten and Sousuke hadn’t realised. It was as though time had slipped through his hands.

In the living room was the old lady and Sousuke peeked his head into the room quickly out of curiosity. He didn’t intend to stay or disturb her. He just wondered why so many candles and why so much flickering light. Yet he wasn’t able to make a swift and subtle escape. Instead she spoke softly.

“Would you like tea?”

Sousuke didn’t know what he wanted. He just wanted distance and sleep yet instead of saying he would go straight to bed, he did the polite thing. He accepted the tea. He took a seat and noted just how many candles littered the surfaces and how they seemed concentrated around the family shrine. The tea was poured with slightly shaking hands and Sousuke accepted it with good grace as his eyes watched the shadow patterns climb the walls.

“How was your evening?”

Her voice was soft in the room and Sousuke looked up and saw an almost glint in her eyes. He coughed and took a sip of tea, the water at a drinkable temperature and then he answered with his own question.

“Do you believe in the Heart of Iwatobi… in Makoto?”

A low laugh rang round the room in reply. “I didn’t think you’d go straight to the point… but I get the feeling you are quite a straight-forward despite the attempts to find some more alternative forms of healing…” She took a sip of her tea and then smiled at Sousuke, her eyes closing, her wrinkles more pronounced in the shadowed flickering light of the candles. “When you have lived as long as I have… you’ll understand. Some things are not rational. Some things cannot be explained. And some things are fate.”

Fate. Another concept that seemed as ridiculous as magic. Fate would suggest that he was _meant_ to have fucked his shoulder. That he was _meant_ to have lost his chance as his career and was _meant_ to watch his best friend achieve it alongside someone else. He hated the idea that this was his path. That everything was meant to lead to here. Sousuke drank the rest of his tea without hesitation and placed his cup down upon the wooden coffee table.

“Thank you for the tea. And your hospitality. I’ll be leaving early in the morning.”

The old lady nodded, a knowing smile that Sousuke was unsure how to read. It was as he was leaving the room, she spoke again.

“I don’t blame him. Not like Kisumi does. Makoto was too young to know how to stop a storm that big… too young to take it all by himself. One day Kisumi will forgive him. He was only a boy.”

Sousuke paused in the doorway briefly then proceeded up the stairs, taking them two at a time as lightly as he could. If he could leave Iwatobi right away, the he would. But instead, he paused on the landing and listened for a moment. Kisumi clearly wasn’t at home but Hayato was. He stepped close to the boys room and he could hear the sound of heavy muffled breathing from the door that was left slightly ajar.

That was why Kisumi believed, why his grandmother believed… why Hayato would grow up believing. As it was better to blame a failure of some person rather than fear the ocean and the storms. To fear nature.

Sighing, Sousuke walked to his guest room and got out his laptop. He deleted all the emails to and from Makoto first then booked the first train out of Iwatobi. It was at 6.49am and he was glad it was that early. Perhaps he wouldn’t even have to say an awkward goodbye.

He replied to Rin and explained that the excursion had not been successful. He shut the laptop down rapidly when he realised that Rin was online and was going to Skype him. He really didn’t want to deal with his friend right now. And he didn’t have to as he packed away his laptop and most of his remaining possessions into his bag.

Stripping, Sousuke got into bed wearing only his boxer briefs and a frown. He still didn’t know why this whole experience was bothering him. Usually he’d be able to just walk away without another thought – even during the more “experimental” treatments but this time his stomach rolled around oddly as he thought about Makoto and his story and the whole idea of magic… Maybe there was a small part of him, a miniscule part of him that wanted Makoto to be magical. To find some otherworldly cure. Yet Sousuke knew that was impossible. So he ignored that part as he tried to sleep.

He tried to sleep. He did. But his brain was buzzing with thoughts and soon Sousuke decided the best way to sleep would to be find some effective method of distraction.

Getting up from his bed, Sousuke moved a chair to the door to ensure that no one could enter and then removed his tight boxer briefs and returned to his previous position. He wasn’t going to watch porn in his guest’s house but he knew he could conjure something in his brain that would give him adequate stimulation. Sousuke threw the covers to the floor and grabbed for his towel that he’d left out for his morning shower and he closed his eyes.

He thought of a hard body pinned under him. He thought of his cock deep inside that body, it squeezed by tight warmth and the feeling of being able to dominate someone. His hand moved, pumping up and down his cock with long strokes. He bit at his own lip as he imagined his hands digging into a guy’s hips, as he looked down to see his dick sliding in and out of a perfect ass… he imagined brown hair and he imagined someone panting and demanding more…. They wanted him so badly and Sousuke could deliver exactly what they wanted and needed.

His hips thrust into his hand, now a loose fist around his cock and Sousuke’s other hand rolled his balls, the extra stimulation taking him close to the edge.

“Fuck me harder…” the voice in Sousuke’s head said. It said it needy… desperate…

Sousuke obliged, his hand moving faster and his hips jerking up and he came, his mouth open in release and one word spilling from it as green eye’s flashed into his mind’s eye.

“Makoto…”

Fuck.


	9. Chapter 9

Sousuke sat on the train back to Tokyo, his long legs folded in front of him and his body relaxing into the plush seat. He felt more relaxed the further he got from Iwatobi and the train was pretty much empty apart from a few commuters. He couldn’t imagine the pain of travelling to a city from Iwatobi everyday but it was very apparent by the suits that it was a common occurrence.

A woman was reading a book, apparently prepared for her long journey and a man sat crossed legged with a tablet in front of his face, his eyes squinting as he appeared to be looking at emails. Sousuke wanted to advise him it would damage his eyes looking that closely at the screen but he doubted the man cared. He was far too focused on his work to notice anyone or anything.

Sat on the otherwise empty seat beside him was an orchid. Sousuke wasn’t usually the sentimental type but when his host had presented him with the orchid, Sousuke could only feel a small lump in his throat as he accepted it. He hadn’t expected her to be awake when he left but she was, a cup of tea in front of her and eyes half closed.

“I hope you find what you’re looking for one day, Sousuke,” she had said, her face and voice solemn.

All Sousuke had been able to do was mutter out thanks in a mumbled tone and take his leave. He had always been awkward during emotional encounters and this was no different.

The journey back home was one that Sousuke had done many times. Usually after an excursion to find a cure, Sousuke was forlorn and felt lost. This time he didn’t. Yet this time there was something gnawing in his gut and he was not sure what it was. Or he was sure what it was. It was Makoto. And the guilty feeling he had due to his somewhat… _impure_ thoughts the previous evening.  

He worried at the inside of his cheek with his teeth and tried to think of other things as he changed trains and drank cups coffee and made his way home.

Thinking of other things were tricky and Sousuke would find himself nodding off into the soft headrest or the cool glass of the window and in those moments he would swear he saw green eyes and he swore he felt the wash of water lap over his skin gently. They were only moments yet Sousuke still felt as though his skin was damp and that his heart was beating far too fast. He just hoped the return home would erase the stupid memories and half-remembered dreams.

Home was as it had always been. As despite the fact Sousuke felt a change himself due to his time in Iwatobi and his encounter with Makoto, his home was still the same and his room was still adorned with the same posters that had covered the walls since his teen years. His parents were glad he was home – his mother made his favourite pork cutlets and his father told him about the deliveries the hardware store was expecting and how Sousuke could help. It was as though he had not been gone and Sousuke joined in the conversation without really taking in his own words never mind anyone else’s. His mind was elsewhere. And he went to bed to early, excusing himself so that he could spend the evening researching his next step rather than some dim distant cure. As he left the room, he could feel his mother’s eyes on him and he heard the heavy sigh from her lips. She obviously had hoped this would work and it was a disappointment to her as well.

Rin had messaged of course. Multiple times. And Sousuke ignored most of them. He wasn’t in the mood for jokes at his expense due to his ability to get lost and he wasn’t interested in discussing Rin’s times in the pool or the interest he was getting from sponsors or his “amazing connection” in the pool with Nanase. That felt like salt in a wound that was just starting to heal. It didn’t need to be re-opened.

The only message he responded to was the invite to Rin’s training session the following day. Rin had even said that Sousuke should “bring a swimsuit”. Usually Sousuke would only watch as the pool was used for competitive swimmers only but the invite to swim was too tempting to refuse and he knew he needed some way to clear his head. Swimming had always done that.

After that, he started his research. It was a relief not to look for a cure. Instead, he was looking for courses, for qualifications, for ways to get into University and do something useful rather than languishing in the back room of a hardware store for the rest of his life. He liked the look of physiotherapy. He researched it thoroughly.

His mind, though, did not remain on task.  As despite himself, Sousuke found his searches leading him back to Iwatobi. He was just curious, he reasoned. It was nothing about Makoto. It was just to see how the weather was. When he saw that the evening was meant to be storm free, he felt a small sigh leave his lips and Sousuke finally closed down his laptop.

Being home was both reassuring and restricting. It felt comforting to be in the room where the bed was big enough for his long limbs and his medals were displayed along with his trophies. Yet he also felt suffocated. He wasn’t sure whether that was due to the sound of the television coming from the living room or the noise of traffic not too far away or the fact he felt like a child still stuck in the room he had had since boyhood. Yet it didn’t matter why.

No, it didn’t matter, Sousuke reasoned as he undressed and got into his bed with the green covers. As soon he’d move on. And soon he’d figure out the next few steps of his life.

The morning came swiftly and Sousuke felt like he had slept like the dead. He still dreamt, vague dreams of the waves once again and he woke with sweat on his brow but he was able to forget about them as quickly as he wiped the stickiness from his eyes. As instead of hearing seabirds and the distant noise of waves, Sousuke heard the sounds of the city and he felt something akin to sadness when he realised his location. He couldn’t believe he actually _missed_ Iwatobi.

He grunted as he got out of bed, heaving his body from the warmth of his cocooned blankets and he dressed quickly knowing that his appearance barely mattered. Not when he was going to be in the swimming pool.

Sousuke didn’t bother eating breakfast, he only grabbed a protein bar that he still had supplies of in his room and then kissed his mother on the way out of the house. His father had already gone to the hardware store and Sousuke would go there too in the afternoon. But first he would see Rin. And first he would swim.

As Sousuke walked to the metro station, he put large headphones over his ears and avoided the world around him. He thought of how he used to feel when he was swimming competitively. How it was his life. Sousuke had wanted to be the best – had wanted to stand on the Olympic podium and prove to the world and himself how good he could be. Sousuke had never had another choice, another dream or another ambition. And he had strived every day to achieve that dream.

Maybe if he’d cared for himself better… maybe if he’d told someone about the injury earlier. Yet Sousuke had been stubborn, afraid he would lose his spot on the swim team and instead of getting the help he needed, Sousuke had only found himself crying in pain after swim competitions alone in the shower. It was too late now anyway. Too late for Sousuke to go back and correct anything.

He boarded the train and Sousuke opted to stand, his hands clasping the cool metal of the pole rather than taking a seat. Sousuke ignored the people in the carriage and tried to get lost in the music that was vibrating in his head. It didn’t work as Sousuke stomach reeled. He wondered if the protein bar was making him sick. He wondered quite how long they had been underneath his bed for as it had been quite a long time since his training days.

He made his way to the pool complex for the University of Tokyo and tried to ignore the feeling of jealousy that had suddenly resurfaced  He knew he should be here. With Rin. Not on the outside. Sousuke tried to shake off the feeling and remember his research and plan but when it was stood in front of him, Sousuke still felt the sting of failure. It was hard not to.

Sousuke knew he could turn back. That Rin would be preoccupied with his training and wouldn’t really care for his best friend’s return home. But Sousuke needed to face this. He had decided to give up on his dream and to find his new future. Today he could finally say goodbye to this version of himself. So Sousuke adjusted the sports bag on his back and took long heavy strides, his sneakers seeming to resonate loudly against the stone below his feet.

There was no need to be jealous, not anymore and so Sousuke made his way to the pool complex to change into his swimsuit and prepare himself to meet his friend and his new swimming companion, Nanase.

Sousuke thought about how he wished Rin would shut up sometimes, that Rin didn’t know him so damn well yet without Rin, Sousuke sometimes wondered if anyone would truly understand him or get how his stubborn brain worked. He didn’t want to lie to Rin, didn’t want to fabricate anything yet he knew he would struggle to tell Rin that he had given up. He thought of those eyes, red and intense, and the time that Rin had nearly punched him due to the stupid ass thing he had said about his dad and Sousuke knew he couldn’t tell Rin about his new idea and the fact he was done with swimming. As he knew he wouldn’t understand, at least not yet, and so Sousuke tried to leave those thoughts in the changing room along with his clothes.

Today he would just swim and enjoy it. Another day he would tell Rin he was moving on. Just not yet.  


	10. Chapter 10

Usually when Sousuke had watched Rin’s swim training sessions, he felt a jealousy that he could not easily control. Yet this time he didn’t. Instead, he just watched the elegance of Rin’s stroke, the power in his legs and arms and the subtle gestures of affection that were directed towards Nanase. All those things in the past may’ve made his blood pressure rise and his hands ball into fists. But this time he just watched, a calm feeling pervading as he sat and relaxed on the uncomfortable bleachers. Near the end of the session, he stripped his old high school swim team jacket off leaving him only in his old teal striped leg skins and he sat at the edge of the pool, his legs dangling into the edge of the pool as he waited for the team to complete their cool down.

Rin swam over after a few slow lengths and took off his goggles and swim cap, putting them beside Sousuke on the edge of the pool. He remained in the water still, his arms holding him up and his legs lazily moving underneath him.

“Great to see you back!” Rin said, his enthusiasm still showing despite exhaustion from the training session. “How did it go?”

Sousuke decided the best answer was a wry smile and a cock of head. “I’m not cured. But it was… different.”

Before Rin could ask anymore, Sousuke decided his best option was to dive into the water and to swim a few lengths himself. He didn’t have goggles or a swimming cap but Sousuke didn’t mind. It wasn’t as though he was racing and needed the advantage of those few seconds so instead he just started slowly, moving his arms and legs in a lazy freestyle stroke.

It felt good. It felt familiar but it also didn’t feel painful. Instead it felt… freeing. Swimming had almost been a trap for Sousuke. It was the one thing he had been good at and therefore he had seemed to spend his entire young life in a cycle of swimming and training, always trying to be better and faster and stronger. Now he wasn’t trying anymore, Sousuke could simply enjoy the feeling of the water and the mindlessness that came from the smooth movements of his body. It reminded him of Makoto, of that feeling of water and Sousuke did a few faster lengths to banish the memory of those green eyes and that kind smile.

Swimming usually caused physical pain as well as scrubbing at the raw emotional scars. But instead of the burning pain in his shoulder, Sousuke only felt a mild discomfort that itched underneath his skin but did not cause the sort of pain he had been used to feeling. He knew he wasn’t pushing himself but still… maybe Makoto _had_ done something. It was ridiculous… it was stupid but somehow for one brief second, Sousuke almost believed in magic. It was a brief moment, ended by his turn and he swam a few more lengths faster and powerful lengths before calling it a day, pulling himself out of the water with only the slightest of stinging in his shoulder muscles.

Rin was now sat on the bleachers just as Sousuke had been sat and he was talking in hushed whispers with Nanase. They had a piece of paper in front of them – Sousuke guessed something regarding their next tournament – and they were looking at it intently until Nanase looked up and his bright blue eyes met Sousuke’s.

It seemed Nanase took this as his cue to leave and Sousuke didn’t mind as he grabbed for his towel and draped it around his neck. He still wasn’t sure how to take Nanase – it seemed all too effortless for him and Sousuke had found that infuriating. The fact that Nanase didn’t seem to goddamn _care_ and it seemed like he didn’t need to do the obsessive amount of training was just plain annoying.  Yet now… Sousuke found his irritation level was not so high. Though he still didn’t have to like the guy.

Sousuke took a seat beside Rin and dried off his hair, the water flicking on his friend who was now dressed in his university team colours and eating a banana. Rin nudged him as pay back for the splashes of water and Sousuke smirked.

“You’re in the splash zone,” he remarked.

Rin shook his head. “No… you’re just an asshole.”

Sousuke only responded by threading a hand through his hair and spraying it in Rin’s direction. They were never going to act mature around one another. That’s what being best friends forever meant. There were years of whispered secrets in the middle of the night, moments when punches were thrown in both jest and in serious anger and there were years of inside jokes and little gestures. Those reasons made it hard for Sousuke to lie as such to Rin… but he couldn’t yet talk about his new future. 

“You seemed better in the water… you sure you didn’t find a magic cure?” Rin asked, his voice light and teasing as he followed his question by eating the final few bites of his snack.

“No, no magic cure… but-” Sousuke stopped. He knew what a part of him wanted to say. That he’d decided to give up on swimming and pursue another career. Another future. But Rin was still so hopeful and Rin was so damn optimistic still and Sousuke didn’t want to make him cry. Rin was too easy to cry. Sappy movies and romantic songs and news stories about old people and puppies… they were all things that made Rin tear up randomly. And Sousuke, a guy who had barely cried in his entire life, even as a baby his mother had said he had never been a crier… well, he couldn’t understand Rin. But he never wanted to be the source of his tears. Even when he mocked him that he could use Rin's tears to fill an Olympic sized pool.

“But?” Rin prompted, his head cocked and his posture seeming as though he had been waiting for some amazing revelation.  

“But… there was a guy.”

It wasn’t a lie. Sousuke sucked at those. He lacked imagination to lie. Yet it wasn’t exactly the truth. He had met Makoto and he had had a dirty masturbatory fantasy but that was it. It wasn’t like they were remaining friends or pen pals or whatever. But it was an easier than the truth.

“Woah… did you actually get laid?”

Sousuke shrugged his shoulders. “None of your damn business.”

Rin did everything to try and get more information about Sousuke’s jaunt to Iwatobi but his attempts were unsuccessful. As Sousuke had to keep the weird feelings for Makoto submerged and try to forget about them.

Yet they didn’t stay that way. Usually after Sousuke had seen Rin, he would go home and mope pathetically, maybe listen to some depressing music on his headphones and stare at the mould spot on his ceiling until he lost focus and saw stars in it. But instead of declining the invite to hang out after the session and go for food, Sousuke opted to join Rin, Nanase and a few of him team mates.

He texted his mother that he didn’t need lunch and walked a little back from the “team” feeling somewhat like the outsider in his high school swim track jacket rather than the university ones that his companions had. Rin explained to his team mates who Sousuke was. It seemed that they had heard about him before as someone sniggered “so this is the monster butterfly dude.”

Sousuke managed a small grunt at the description and Rin chuckled. “You guys wait until he gets his shoulder fixed… he’ll kick all your asses, right, Sou?”

“Right,” he said, his voice low enough so that it was barely audible.

Maybe he should’ve told Rin about his new career choice yet when Rin gave him a smile , Sousuke found it impossible to ruin his good mood.  He didn’t want to make the cheerful asshole cry.

They were at the restaurant when Sousuke’s phone buzzed and he saw his mother had responded about him not needing lunch. He briefly checked his emails and found his heart jump into his throat for a moment. As there was one from Makoto. It wasn’t as though it was entirely unexpected. He supposed they hadn’t exactly left things on bad terms. Or any terms as such. But despite that, Makoto’s message hit him hard. Maybe it was because he was home and it made his weird trip to Iwatobi more real seeming. It could almost be a dream if it didn’t infect his “real” life but Makoto was already bleeding into his existence in Tokyo and he wasn’t sure why it shocked his so much.

The email was innocuous. He hoped they could “talk more in the future” as things seemed “unresolved.” Or at least it was innocuous until Makoto said that “I miss you… I feel we had a connection that we didn’t explore”. Sousuke almost fell off the chair he was sitting on in that moment and instead of letting the rest of the people around the table see his lack of composure, he hauled his heavy seeming body from his seat and went to the restroom in order to splash some water on his face.

A connection… well, maybe Sousuke had a dirty fantasy of fucking Makoto yet that was all. He was staring at his reflection in the mirror, his hands holding himself up as he leaned over the sink when Rin appeared in the bathroom.

“You okay… you don’t seem like yourself?”

Rin stood casually, leaning against a wall and he looked pale and concerned in the harsh lighting of the bathroom. He did look exhausted. Training was hard at this level, Sousuke knew that and Rin had always pushed himself hard, determined to succeed where his father had not. Sousuke always hoped that Rin wouldn't make the same mistakes as he did and push himself too far. 

“Yeah… just hungry. I didn’t eat breakfast before I came out.”

Anyone else might’ve accepted that. Rin didn’t. Instead he stepped forward, a smirk on his face.

“The guy?”

Sousuke straightened up and tried to summon up a defence.

“You looked at your phone, looked like you saw a ghost and bolted. He tell you it was just a fling?”

“It _was_ just a fling,” Sousuke responded, his face in a pout.

“Yeah… I believe you,” Rin said with a wink, “now message him back. See where it goes… fuck knows you need someone else besides me on your ass.”

Sousuke raised his eyebrows and Rin laughed. “Not literally on your ass… you know,” Rin said and then kicked at Sousuke shin, “just stop pissing around. You already seemed  a changed guy and if it’s because of him… At least try, Sou. I want to see you happy. I can’t deal with a grumpy bastard my entire life.”

The best response to Rin’s comments was a bump to the shoulder so Sousuke did that. Not too gently either which made Rin back off back towards the door.

“Think about it Sousuke… your life didn’t end with the injury.”

“Yeah,” Sousuke murmured as he watched Rin go out of the bathroom and to join his friends and Nanase around the table.

With one more splash of water to his face, Sousuke stared at himself in the mirror and then looked at the email. He wouldn’t write a response now…. But soon. He had to figure out what he wanted to say and for a man of few words like Sousuke was… that would take some time.


	11. Chapter 11

“Can you get down that box, Sou?”

Sousuke grunted and lifted the box from the high shelf, passing it down to his father’s outstretched arms. While his father was tall, Sousuke was taller and he was sure that’s why his father had liked his help around the hardware store. Also his seeming endless strength. Or at least his strength until he screwed his shoulder up…

“I’ll need your help moving around the stock room as well before you go…” his father said after depositing box on the floor.

Nodding, Sousuke continued his helping and didn’t say anything. His mother and father were being very supportive of his new endeavour but Sousuke couldn’t help feeling his father was slightly disappointed that he was not going to work alongside him anymore. It was agreed that Sousuke would stay closer to the University with Rin and travel back home at weekends but he was no longer obligated to work in the shop. His father had been forced to hire someone and Sousuke had seen him – shy and silver haired and small. He hardly seemed like he fitted in among the tools and wood but then Sousuke guessed it was such a poor paying job that someone would have to be young to wanted. And this guy sure did look young.  He seemed pleasant enough despite being somewhat shy around Sousuke.  

Sousuke’s parents were pleased for him and maybe both relieved. Yet despite this relief, Sousuke could almost sense some disappointed at the same time. It seemed to Sousuke that his mother believed he would find a cure for his injury and so by Sousuke stopping his search, she had to finally give up hope too. And Sousuke assumed his father just still wanted him around to help in the shop and maybe take over responsibility as he grew older. Instead he was now finally breaking out on his own and had stopped living in the past trying to follow an impossible dream.

Yet while he had stopped thinking about his Olympic dreams as much, he had not stopped thinking about another part of his past. Or at least his most recent past. Iwatobi lingered on his mind and more specifically Makoto. After that first email, Sousuke had spent a day going and back and forth about how to respond. At first, he thought about ignoring it and not dealing with the fluttering feeling in his stomach that had become even more apparent every time he re-read those words. Yet he found ignoring the situation was only making the feelings in his gut worse and after a night of restless sleeping and vivid dreams of green eyes (accompanied by sticky sheets), Sousuke decided that replying was the best course of action.

But by replying Sousuke discovered something.

Email was the hardest form of communication ever.

Or maybe it wasn’t and just Sousuke sucked at most forms of communication. As every time he tried to write a response, Sousuke nearly wanted to throw his laptop out of the window due to the lameness of the words that appeared on the white blank page in front of him.

He didn’t even know how to start an email to Makoto. Each time he began to type, Sousuke deleted it and he even contemplated asking Rin for assistance due to that obsession with cheesy romance that Rin seemed to have. Too proud to ask for assistance, Sousuke finally managed to respond to the email.

And immediately regret that he had. It had been barely coherent. It had been dumb. He had even made some kind of innuendo about the “connection” that Makoto had mentioned. It was all so unlike Sousuke that he wished that he hadn’t tried to be charming or funny or _whatever_ he was trying to be through the email.

However, despite Sousuke’s mortification and general feeling he had royally fucked up this potential connection with Makoto, he had received a response. And after that, the emails flowed at a regular rate.  They weren’t really flirting but soon it became the highlight of Sousuke’s day to see an email from Makoto on his smartphone. He would read the email on his phone and then not respond until he had ample time on his laptop where he could stare at each word he typed until he was sure there was nothing stupid nor embarrassing in the content.

The interaction with Makoto soon became a comfort to Sousuke as he began to feel an anxiety about his new career path. The encouragement came thick and fast from Makoto and Sousuke began to reconcile his anxiety as part of dealing with the huge change that was about to happen in his life. A change he was ready for. Or as ready as he could be.

“Sou… move these boxes to that side,” Sousuke’s father ordered.

“Sure,” he mumbled, his father’s voice bringing Sousuke’s mind back from the hazy day-dreaming and to dispel the fog that had seemed to infect his mind.

Helping in the stockroom was a good distraction. It was good for a few reasons. Firstly it was because Sousuke didn’t have to think - Sousuke just followed his father’s instructions and moved items to where they needed to be.  The task required no thought and it also required nothing more than brute strength. It was good to slow down the whirling cogs of Sousuke’s mind. The other reason was the almost cave like isolation of the stockroom. Located in the back of the shop, it had no windows and only the one door. It was hot, cramped and dusty and Sousuke also had no signal on his phone so was effectively completely cut off from the outside world.

As was habit, Sousuke continued to check his phone for messages from Rin and emails from Makoto, but each time he was confronted with the lack of signal. Each time he checked, he would shrug his shoulders and push his sweaty hair from his eyes and continue on with his moving around of boxes. It seemed at times that Sousuke had moved the same box multiple times and he was not sure whether his father’s was confused or trying to keep him working for longer than necessary. Yet despite his father’s attempts to keep Sousuke engaged in the stockroom, the job appeared to be complete. His father disappeared and procured drinks from the small shop down the street so they could take a break.

Sousuke was glad of the reprieve from the dark and claustrophobic room. He sniffed at the armpits of his white t-shirt and wrinkled his nose, vowing to have a hot long shower when he returned home.

A drink in each of their hands, father and son sat on the small step in front of the store and let the new guy watch the store as they sat drinking the refreshing watermelon flavoured drink. They didn’t talk, they only watched the cars and pedestrian and the looming clouds gathering above. Due to his time in the dark of the stockroom, Sousuke hadn’t realised the weather had changed from the bright but chilly day and as he sat on the step, Sousuke began to feel the cold seep into his bones due to the sweat on his skin.  He knew he should grab the teal hoodie he had left on the counter but he decided to enjoy the moment with his father knowing it would be a rare one of silent companionship. The silence didn’t bother Sousuke, nor did it bother his father as they had never really talked. They were too alike. Too stubborn and stoic and bull-headed.

Sousuke knew that his father hoped that he would run the family business. Yet Sousuke had never planned to do that. Even after his dreams of the Olympics had faded, he still didn’t want the responsibility of the hardware store. He wanted something else before he even defined it.

“There’s storms coming,” his father said, his voice rough, breaking the extended spell of silence. He coughed as though trying to clear his throat. “There’s been storms on the coast… finally got here.”

Talking about the weather was a usual boring conversation topic to avoid _really_ talking. Sousuke didn’t think about it at first, only looked up to the sky and saw the clouds grey and looming above him. He only managed an “hmmm” before he felt a jolt in his stomach.

“There was a storm at the coast?” he asked.

“Storms up and down the coast. Boats sunk. Fisherman dead. Damage to houses.”

His father spoke matter-of-factly as though it was nothing. Yet despite the monotonous way the words were spoken, Sousuke felt a rising panic in his throat and he got to his feet, his fingers fumbling for the phone in his pocket with shaking fingers.

Makoto had been responding to Sousuke’s emails on almost daily basis. But yesterday Makoto had not responded. Sousuke thought nothing of it. Actually, he did think something about it. He had been disappointed by the lack of response and refreshed his email account far too many times but then he had not worried about Makoto. As after all, Makoto had another life and Sousuke had no part of it. Sousuke didn’t live in Iwatobi. He didn’t know what Makoto did with his family. Nor did he know about the things Makoto did as the “Heart of Iwatobi” even though Sousuke didn’t believe in the stupid title. All he knew was Makoto hadn’t responded to his emails and there had been storms on the coast…

 “Ugh…I gotta go,” Sousuke mumbled out, his words slurred as though drink. He spilt the remains of the watermelon soda on the floor and waved half-heartedly at his father.

It seemed as though Sousuke’s  father wanted to say something about his son’s unusual and awkward behaviour but it was left on his lips as Sousuke didn’t give him chance. As Sousuke started to jog home without looking back as he tried to scan his phone to find out news from Iwatobi. With a quick scan, he could see there had been bad storms in Iwatobi and Sousuke felt a lump in his throat as he imagined Makoto being an dumbass and being stood half naked in the cold sea trying to stop the waves as he _believed_ he had power.

What if he’d been dragged out to sea? What if he’d drowned? What if the reason Makoto hadn’t responded was…?

Sousuke shook his head. “No,” he said to himself as an affirmation.

There was no way Makoto was dead. And it really shouldn’t matter to him… it would be sad, yes but…

Sousuke knew he was lying to himself as he arrived home, as he ran to his room without a word to his mother and booted up his laptop as quickly as he could. He threw off his t-shirt, the sweat chilling him to the bone as he wandered round the room in a fit of anxiety. The laptop took an inordinate time to load up and when it was finally done he was able to find what he needed.

A number.

Sousuke had communicated with Makoto via email. They hadn’t exchanged any other details and Sousuke had been meaning to ask for a phone number but he had been unable to ask the question in a way that didn’t seem needy and desperate so he had refrained.

But he did have one number in Iwatobi.

A quick search and Sousuke was dialling. He sat on his bed, the weight of the world on his weary shoulders and the phone rang far too many times until it was answered.

And when it was answered it did not help Sousuke.

“Hello?”

“Hayato?” Sousuke said.

“Yes. Who is it?” the boy asked cautiously.

“It’s Sousuke… I stayed with you last month. Is your grandmother or brother there?”

“Sousuke!” the boy replied excitedly. “No… there’s only me here… are you calling about Makoto?”

“What about Makoto?” Sousuke demanded, his voice raising due to impatience.

“My grandmother says he’s sleeping.”

Sousuke almost dropped his phone. “He’s… dead?”

“No,” Hayato said, “he’s in a co…. something.”

“A coma?” Sousuke prompted the boy.

“Yeah a coma, that’s what they said…”

Breathing a slight sigh of relief, Sousuke made a plan in an instant. “Is the room I stayed in being used at the moment?”

“No… no one since you.”

“Good… when you see your grandmother, tell her to keep it free.”

“Why?” Hayato asked, his curiosity piqued, his voice brighter.

“I’m coming to Iwatobi.”


	12. Chapter 12

Sousuke had not expected to ever return to Iwatobi. He never thought he would repeat the long-winded journey and spend his time wishing away the distance and time yet here he was. Sat on a train. Travelling back to Iwatobi. To Makoto.

He had barely explained the situation to his parents. He had never “come out” as such to his mother and father. It wasn’t as though his sexuality was a dinner table topic of conversation and Sousuke had never really found himself sexually attracted to just one gender. Really he didn’t waste his time thinking of the world in that black and white mentality and so he had never had a conversation with his parent’s about such things. He’d never brought home a girlfriend or a boyfriend. It wasn’t because he was ashamed but because there had been no one important enough to introduce to them.

Maybe he should’ve said more. His mother looked worried by his behaviour and his father had phoned him, a very rare occurrence that Sousuke couldn’t remember ever happening before. His father hated smart phones and technology. And yet he used it.

Sousuke ignored it as he ignored everything as he sat anxiously watching the world pass by the window of the train. It was different than his first journey, rain spattered and dark, and Sousuke supposed it was a good thing. The weather and the atmosphere on the train suited his mood. He gnawed at the inside of his cheek and felt his leg jiggling as he sat in the plush seat that now felt very uncomfortable due to the rolling feeling in his stomach.

There was very little ways to reassure himself. Sousuke found that he was  unable to search the internet, his phone signal erratic and dying due to the weather. He wasn’t sure whether it was a good or a bad thing as it meant he was cut off from the rest of the world. Perhaps he would worry more if he saw stories of people dying and wasn’t sure if Makoto was among them. Right now all Sousuke knew was that there had been storms in Iwatobi and some fishing boats had been lost and nothing about Makoto.

Yet then he knew what Makoto believed. What the town thought Makoto was. If he was the Heart of Iwatobi, he was meant to control the storms and protect the town. And the last time Makoto had been unable to protect it had led to the death of Kisumi and Hayato’s parents. That time, Makoto had been too young and inexperienced at using the mystical power he had inherited. This time, Sousuke knew Makoto was older and wiser and stronger. Strong enough to stand in the sea with his shirt off. Strong enough for Sousuke to feel like he was drowning when Makoto touched his skin.

There was a power within Makoto even if Sousuke didn’t truly believe in such things. There had to be _something_ about Makoto for Sousuke to feel like he did. It couldn’t be just lust. It wasn’t just because he needed to get laid.

His intermittent phone signal came back and Sousuke saw the messages from Rin. He had forgotten, of course, that he was meant to be moving some of his belongings to the small apartment that Rin rented near the university campus. He knew his friend would worry. And he knew Rin would contact his parents and find out why he had gone missing so damn quickly.

Scowling, Sousuke opted to turn off his phone. He didn’t need to be connected to home. He knew it would panic Rin but Sousuke didn’t care as his head was full of Makoto.

The closer the train got to Iwatobi, the darker the sky seemed to be and Sousuke tried to ignore the rain that started to splatter against the window in large droplets. It was as though he was travelling to the eye of a storm and Sousuke wondered what he was going to see when he arrived at his destination. Had the town been damaged by the storm? Was Makoto really in a coma? And why did it all matter so _damn_ much to Sousuke? All those questions swirled around his head as he watched the drowned world pass by the window.

Iwatobi was weather ravaged when Sousuke arrived. While the damage wasn’t as catastrophic as Sousuke had imagined, he could see fallen branches and damaged roof tiles, as the rain beat down on the town. The sea, tranquil and beautiful and hypnotic to Sousuke at first, was violent and grey and rolling. It was a different town than the one Sousuke had visited that first time.

Maybe that was because the Heart of Iwatobi was comatose. Then Sousuke thought that idea was fucking ridiculous. But still the whole town seemed in a depression that was not just due to the rain that seemed to be submerging Iwatobi in darkness and grey.

The familiar paths were empty, the windows closed and Sousuke felt a sense of foreboding that made his steps quicken and his eyes stare at the wet pathways beneath his feet. He thought about visiting his lodgings and leaving his bag. But he had such a meagre amount of belongings, Sousuke didn’t. He just increased his pace to a jog and arrived at Makoto’s house, the rain starting to fall even more heavily as he approached.

The Tachibana residence had been transformed. And Sousuke paused as he saw the candles and people and photographs that littered the way to the doorway. It was as though Makoto had died and for a second Sousuke felt his stomach lurch at the very idea that Makoto had passed away since the last conversation with Hayato. Yet the prayers Sousuke heard, hushed in the dreary day, were for Makoto to awake and his fear of death was allayed.

People stared at Sousuke as he approached the Tachibana house. Sousuke had never felt so big and awkward, his steps feeling far too long and short at the same time. He felt uncomfortable in his own skin as people watched him, gossiped about him and it was only when he had stepped over candles and stuffed animals as gifts, and arrived at the door did he think the same as everyone else present. Why was he here?

It was too late now. Maybe if he had not been watched by half the town of Iwatobi, Sousuke could’ve turned away and gone home. Got back on the train. Done what he was meant to be doing. Yet instead he knocked heavily on the door and waited. He wasn’t sure what to expect but was pleasantly surprised to see the twins he had met briefly answering the door. He wasn't sure what he would say to Makoto's parents.

The girl blinked as she looked up and then a look of recognition crossed her face.

“You came to see Makoto once,” she stated. It wasn’t a question but Sousuke answered it like one – not sure what to say to the two miniature people in front of him. He could admit that kids weren’t his thing.

“I came to see him to help my shoulder… I wanted to see how he was.”

The boy answered this time, snorting so that his brown hair fluttered due to his dramatic gesture. The brown was similar to that of Makoto’s. “He’s sleeping. He’s done nothing but sleep since the storm.”

He sounded bored, not worried and Sousuke couldn’t help the puzzled expression that crossed his face.

“You can come in and see him. It won’t be very interesting…”

The twins allowed Sousuke to enter and he removed his sneakers out of respect and closed the door behind him. As he walked in, he saw what he guessed were Makoto’s parents sat at the kitchen table as the girl went to explain who Sousuke was. It seemed neither parent cared about the visitor, the mother seemingly on the verge of tears and the father holding onto her. The twins, maybe they too believed the Heart of Iwatobi thing, didn’t seem as traumatised as their parents by the whole ordeal. Though Sousuke couldn’t imagine how hard it was for a parent to sit by powerless as their son was in a coma in his childhood bedroom.

It made Sousuke remember everything he had ever put his parents through. All those times he had been in pain and tried to fight through his injury. He’d never really thought it until the moment Makoto’s mother looked up and met his eye. And Sousuke suddenly considered another perspective he had yet to think about.

Sousuke made his way to Makoto’s room as he had done once before. He didn’t need to ask anyone. He dreamt about this place, about the surreal evenings and days he had spent in Iwatobi and he often saw those green eyes. There had been something in his subconscious telling him to return to Iwatobi. He had just not intended to do so in such odd circumstances.

Makoto’s room was like it had been when Sousuke had visited. Yet at the same time it seemed very different. Or maybe that was because instead of a smiling Makoto sat in a chair, the Makoto now was in the bed, his eyes closed and his chest rising and falling slowly. He looked so peaceful. Yet he could see a bandage over his forehead, winding around to the back of his head and Sousuke saw how Makoto’s hair stuck out at different angles due to the white material.

Walking slowly, Sousuke could smell incense, and he saw Jiji the cat was curled by Makoto’s side, in the crux of his underarm as though the animal was keeping him company during his sleep. As to Sousuke all it looked like was sleep. It couldn’t be more than that, Sousuke thought, but then he remembered the shrine outside and the tears in Makoto’s mother’s eyes. It was definitely more than sleep.

Now Sousuke was here, he wasn’t quite sure what he intended to do. If Makoto was awake, Sousuke would’ve wanted to talk to him. Maybe try something foolish like try to kiss him. Sousuke was no good at talking about feelings so a kiss seemed the best route. It was direct. To the point. Yet now  that Makoto was in a coma, it was hardly the time for Sousuke to pull some kind of move. As after all, Makoto wasn’t able to respond.

Wrestling with the urge to just leave, Sousuke opted to walk a bit further into the room and take a seat in the chair that had been placed just beside Makoto’s bed. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to sit, Sousuke wasn’t exactly sure how long he wanted to stay, yet he sat briefly and reached out to the touch the soft fur of the cat, ignoring the pale skin of Makoto.

Jiji, who had been sleeping, opened her eyes and responded to Sousuke’s touch favourably.

“Well at least you seem to like me being here,” Sousuke said with a sigh as he let his hands drop back on his lap as he gazed at Makoto.

“I don’t why I’m here,” he muttered to himself, a hand running through his hair. “But I can’t forget you. Every time I try… I can’t.”

He shook his head and got to his feet. He needed to go home. Yes, emails from Makoto had become the highlight of his day but Sousuke couldn’t do anything. Nor could he believe the Heart of Iwatobi bullshit despite the scene outside the Tachibana house. He was battling common sense and something else…

As he looked down at Makoto, Sousuke couldn’t help but take in details he had never seen. Like the freckles on his nose. The light stubble on his chin. The way his lips looked chapped. The bandage ruined the aesthetics of Makoto’s hair but still Sousuke could see all the colours that were streaked through it and he fought the urge to touch it to see how soft it was.

He thought how he had dreamed of Makoto, how he thought about drowning and Sousuke’s eyes narrowed again to those lips. Those lips that were lightly parted, dry, whistling low breaths taken. And Sousuke thought about his original plan.

He thought about fairy stories and magic, about how to wake the sleeping maiden and he leaned down, his heart in his throat and he brushed his lips lightly over Makoto’s.

Sousuke wasn’t sure what he hoped for. That he hoped that green eyes would open and blink. That he hoped that Makoto would speak through those dry lips. Instead all that happened was that Jiji shifted and moved to lie on Makoto’s stomach and Sousuke stood straight and felt like a fool.

“No such thing as magic,” Sousuke mumbled, his voice barely audible and cracking.

He turned to leave, walking towards the stairs and slowly going down them, the gloom of Iwatobi and the sight of Makoto setting in. He was putting on his sneakers, ready to go, when he heard something. At first he thought it was nothing as he continued towards the door, his hand on the handle, yet Jiji was hissing, meowing, spitting - a distressing noise that was heard around the house.

And then there was a voice. A voice saying one word. It wasn’t loud and Sousuke wasn’t sure if he heard it or imagined. Or, indeed, if he felt it through his bones. Yet Makoto said one thing through chapped lips.

“Sousuke.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the people still reading and commenting! Appreciated, as always, hopefully we're on the home straight now!

The commotion meant Sousuke was ushered out of the Tachibana house and was unable to find out anything about Makoto for what seemed like hours. Sousuke got it. For a torturous span of hours, the Tachibana family had dealt with the fear of losing their oldest son. And now that he was awake, it would feel like a miracle. Or maybe even like magic.

Dazed, confused, Sousuke could hear the cheers, the talking around him and he almost stumbled and tripped as he walked away. The sky seemed like it had lightened since Sousuke had entered the house but he refused to believe it was because of Makoto’s awakening. As really, Makoto wasn’t magic and Sousuke definitely didn’t have any mystic power. And certainly a kiss had not woken Makoto. That was the stuff of fairy tales or the romantic movies that Rin seemed to like a _little_ too much for Sousuke’s taste.

Unable to find a way to get close to Makoto, he went to the only other place he knew in Iwatobi. He found himself back in the same house with the same old lady and the same grandchildren she loved and doted on.  The news of Makoto’s awakening was met with happiness from the old woman and Hayato. Kisumi, as seemed usual, didn’t give much expression on his face away about how he felt about Makoto. Yet if Sousuke looked close, he could almost imagine he saw relief in his eyes and a line of worry on his forehead had disappeared as soon as Sousuke had announced that Makoto was once again awake and in no mortal danger.

Or at least Sousuke assumed so. There was no evidence to suggest that Makoto was out of the woods yet but somehow, Sousuke was sure that all was well with him. Even if he couldn’t explain why he felt like that. He shook his head in an attempt to rid himself of the unhelpful thoughts of magic and kisses that woke people from comas yet there was a lightness in his heart that was hard to ignore. And Sousuke knew what Rin always said about him – that he was a grumpy asshole, that he was anti-social, that he pretended he was a badass for effect but right now he was finding it hard to keep his usual stoicism in check. 

Tea was made, food was prepared and Sousuke did the right thing. He messaged his parents and explained his quick departure on a friend in Iwatobi being hurt in a storm. It wasn’t untrue and Sousuke felt better for not lying to his parents. It didn’t say _everything_ but it said enough. To Rin, he simply explained it was Makoto. And when Rin replied, Sousuke ignored those messages and put his phone away to avoid getting into some conversation that would just involve how he needed to get laid. Which was all Rin’s advice ever seemed to be.

“You came a long way for Makoto,” the old woman said later on in the evening.

Hayato had gone to bed after Sousuke had agreed to play some game that seemed some cheaters version of hide and seek. Kisumi had departed to meet some friends and now that the night had drawn in it was just Sousuke and the old woman. The woman who always seemed to be able to look through him with those eyes that knew pain and love.

Sousuke didn’t know what to say to that. He grunted his assent, took a sip of tea wishing that there was something stronger in it. Being an athlete, Sousuke had never really done the drunken teen thing but he had occasionally drunk small glasses of whiskey or sake and enjoyed the warming sensation. Right now, he wished he had something like that.

“Do you believe now?” she asked, her eyes shining.

“I…” Sousuke started and then paused. He wanted to say that he didn’t. That all of it was superstitious bullshit and none of it meant anything in reality. That magic wasn’t real. That the Heart of Iwatobi was just an outdated legend. That because Sousuke couldn’t hold it in his hands, it didn’t mean anything, that it wasn’t tangible… yet Sousuke couldn’t bring himself to say that. Not entirely. “I’m not sure.”

She hummed to herself and nothing else was said between them until Sousuke took his leave to the room he had stayed in before, the room that often haunted his dreams.

It was unchanged. Sousuke wasn’t sure if that was settling or unsettling. Whichever it was, Sousuke knew with a certainty he would not sleep well in this bed. And that wasn’t because it was too small. He debated about going for a run, he debated about finding somewhere that did sell alcohol (surely there was one in such a small town) but instead he sat on the bed and leaned his head back against the wall.

“What do I believe?” he asked the four blank walls.

They didn’t answer.  Stupid walls. Sousuke stared sourly at them, thinking, for hours until he finally found himself growing tired enough to lay his head on the pillows. He didn’t bother undressing, didn’t see the need, and instead Sousuke lay down as best as he could on the too small bed and tried to at least get some rest. Perhaps he wouldn’t sleep but rest would be enough.

He would head back home tomorrow, there was no point in staying – Sousuke would try to see Makoto and then once he was satisfied that he had seen him, Sousuke would head back to Tokyo and do what he was meant to be doing. He kept this mundane thought in his brain, thought about his new career path and all that he needed to learn and that dull thought allowed an uneasy sleep to overcome him.

If he thought his dreams were haunted by Makoto when he was at home, it was nothing compared to the dreams he had in Iwatobi. There were green eyes, there was rushing water and waves, there was the taste of coffee and the smell of salt water. It was all his senses and Sousuke realised that in this dream, he was the one who could control the storms. He was the Heart of Iwatobi, in the ocean, shirtless as the waves crested over him. Though next to him was Makoto. Who smiled that smile that had undone Sousuke that first time. It was a tilt of head and a slight raise of lips and the way the eyes closed in pleasure. And as he looked at Makoto, Sousuke was distracted – so damn distracted that a wave engulfed him, cold and pushing him over. Yet he didn’t feel scared by the water filling his lungs, by the way the waves buffeted him and how he was unable to fight his way against the waves. He felt a comfort. Maybe that was how Makoto had felt – that he belonged to the waves and it didn’t matter if he drowned in a storm.

“Sousuke…”

He heard his name, the words distorted and seemingly wrong, and then he heard it more clearly. It was as though the water in his ears had subsided as he heard his name once again.

“Sousuke.”

Less vague and real seeming, Sousuke opened his eyes feeling as though he was dreaming somehow. As he had to be. As there was Makoto, dripping wet and dressed only in checked pyjama pants. And Sousuke could only stare at the way his chest moved as he took long and drown out breaths.

It had to be a dream as Makoto appeared almost ghost like as he was deathly pale with dark bags underneath his eyes. He looked thinner than Sousuke remembered and he was shivering. It took moments, moments of gazing and taking in every detail of Makoto for Sousuke to finally react. And he reacted by hopping out of the uncomfortable bed and wrapping Makoto in his arms to ascertain whether it was a fevered dream or reality.

 What confronted him was with reality. As Makoto was very solid in Sousuke’s arms – solid and cold and wet. Glancing at the floor, Sousuke could see a trail of water leading from the doorway and he wondered whether Makoto had woken the other inhabitants of the house. Yet it all seemed as silent as usual. The only noise was Makoto’s laboured breathing, his chattering teeth, his shivering body underneath Sousuke’s fingertips.

“What are you doing here?” Sousuke asked, his voice harsher than he intended it to sound.

It wasn’t that Sousuke _hadn’t_ though or fantasied about a very similar set of circumstances but the half-naked Makoto in Sousuke’s dirty thoughts was less cold and less scarily pale.

“I needed… _you.”_

The “you” was said so quietly that if Sousuke hadn’t been so close that he would not have heard it all. Yet he did. And Sousuke wasn’t sure how it made him feel. His stomach did a somersault, his heart skipped a beat and his throat suddenly seemed tight. He couldn’t articulate anything. Neither did he have the opportunity as Makoto grew suddenly heavy in Sousuke’s arms, his body losing whatever strength it had as they stood together in the dim light of Sousuke’s temporary home.

“I need to lie down,” Makoto mumbled out.

Sousuke didn’t say anything. Only acted. He raised one of Makoto’s arms and put it around his own  neck and walked with Makoto to the small bed. With Sousuke’s support, Makoto was able to get to the bed and sit, moving to lie down without Sousuke saying another word.

Looking down at Makoto, glistening with rain water and sweat, Sousuke didn’t know what to think. Did Makoto’s parents know he was here? And more importantly _why_ was Makoto here? Why did he need Sousuke? Scowling for a second, Sousuke debated about how he was going to be able to sleep after _this_ when a hand grabbed for his wrist and with more force than Sousuke expected in Makoto’s weakened state, Sousuke ended up being pulled down to the bed that was far too small for both of them to even attempt to sleep in.

Makoto didn’t seem to care and when Sousuke managed to find a sliver of space on the mattress, Makoto curled around him in a way that linked them from head to toe. It was intimate yet for some reason, it didn’t feel entirely sexual. Yeah, Sousuke could feel the arousal of having someone as sexy as Makoto in his bed, but he didn’t want anything but to feel Makoto’s body and warm him up with his own heat.

 It wasn’t comfortable and they were both far too big for the bed on their own. Yet Sousuke didn’t care. He only breathed in the scent of salt water and sweat and let an uneasy sleep fall over him despite the whirling thoughts and questions he had.

With a sigh, breathing in the smell of Makoto’s hair, Sousuke closed his eyes and attempted to sleep. 

He would deal with everything in the morning.


	14. Chapter 14

Sousuke thought he was dreaming. Or at least he was delusional. Yet when he woke up, he realised very quickly that neither were true as it was very obvious that Makoto was in his bed.

The bed was far too small and Sousuke was far too hot as he’d slept in his goddamn clothes but he couldn’t move. Nor did he want to when his nose was buried into the skin of Makoto’s neck and his lips were nearly pressed against his flesh.

It was tempting to kiss, to lick and taste but Makoto was still asleep and Sousuke had no idea whether his actions were reciprocated. He barely knew Makoto… he knew they had this “connection” as Makoto called it but it was not like he could assume. Hell, Sousuke had never been more confused in his life this early in the morning. So instead of over thinking, he closed his eyes and nuzzled into Makoto’s hot skin, revelling in the closeness and trying not to make his morning erection too obvious to Makoto. Least he could blame it on the zipper of his jeans if all else failed.

Hiding his desire was  tricky and Sousuke blamed his lack of recent action for his body’s treacherous reactions. Though he supposed he could’ve got laid the night before and still feel like this as it seemed like Makoto’s body was moulded to his and they were so hot and so close…

A small grunt came from Makoto’s lips and Sousuke wasn’t sure whether it was time to move. He started to untangle himself, move his mouth from its precarious position but as he made his attempt he heard a voice.

“Stay with me.”

Sousuke wasn’t going to decline that request. Not when it was said in that sleep-filled way. Not when it came from Makoto’s lips. The Makoto he had spent half of his days dreaming about.

“Okay,” he mumbled.

He didn’t try and move again for some time. The rest of the house was moving – Sousuke could hear Hayato and he could smell food but he ignored those interruptions and instead forgot about anything but Makoto’s body pressed up against his own. Sousuke felt lazy, exhausted and he floated in daydreams of oceans and swimming alongside Makoto in the currents.

It was only when it became very apparent that Sousuke needed the bathroom did he finally give in and get up from the bed. And when he did so, Makoto seemed to whine as Sousuke detached himself. Makoto seemed almost cat-like at that point, curling back into the warm spot that Sousuke vacated and it made him reluctant to leave. But he did, using the bathroom and then quietly making his way down the stairs so that he could get a glass of water.

Thankfully the house was empty and Sousuke saw a note to say that the old woman had gone shopping for some fresh vegetables and fish. He wondered whether the woman was as perceptive as always and had left because she was aware of Sousuke’s late night visitor yet whatever it was, Sousuke only thanked fate for the intervention.

He ran the cold tap for a while with his hand under until his skin felt numb. It gave him opportunity to think about his next actions and what he should do. Though Sousuke really didn’t know what he _should_ do. He knew what he wanted to do. And he growled under his breath at the knot of desire that was located in his stomach. He had calmed down his morning erection but thinking of Makoto near naked in his temporary bed was threatening that it would re-emerge and Sousuke completed the simple task of getting cold water to distract from what was going on within his underwear.

Unsure whether Makoto would want food, Sousuke found some dry crackers and carried the packet up the stairs, pausing when he reached the door and listening to see if there was any sign that Makoto was awake. It was easier if Makoto was asleep. Then nothing could happen. Yet when he walked in, Sousuke could see that Makoto was stood by the window and had it open, the morning breeze ruffling his brown hair in a way that was too damn beautiful.

Sousuke tried to shake that thought away but Makoto was beautiful. Almost not quite real. At least not to someone like Sousuke who was pragmatic and practical.

“I brought you…” Sousuke said, gesturing towards the glass and crackers in his hands.  

Makoto smiled. “Thank you.”

He didn’t take the crackers, only the water, drinking it in one long drag and Sousuke watched, his eyes narrowing at the way his throat swallowed and his head tipped back. His whole body was aching to touch, aching for something more than just physical release and Sousuke could only watch. Only watch until Makoto put the glass on the window sill, finished, and stepped closer did Sousuke find that aching had stopped. And that was because Makoto was close, his hand was wrapped around Sousuke’s wrist and his lips were pressed against Sousuke’s.

His mind didn’t quite comprehend. But his body was quicker to catch up. Sousuke opened his mouth and dropped the stupid crackers as he titled his head and wrapped an arm around Makoto’s waist, hands settling at the small of his back, the skin feeling soft under his fingertips. The kiss tasted fresh, like water, but not the water Makoto had just drunk. It tasted like something different. A new taste in his mouth.

Makoto moaned as Sousuke dragged him closer, his hands pulling at Sousuke’s clothes. He suddenly felt very covered, especially next to Makoto’s near nakedness and Sousuke let go of Makoto’s flesh so that he could relieve himself of his jeans, almost tripping out of them as he shimmied as best as he could. He didn’t want to leave Makoto’s lips, didn’t want to stop the kiss, it felt like drowning and he was willing to drown as they stumbled around the room together, crashing onto the bed like waves.

Sousuke felt something different beyond any sexual encounter he had ever had. He wasn’t Rin who thought about sex as “making love” or whatever else his ridiculous best friend thought. Sousuke’s sexual experiences had been quick and emotionless rutting with sparse kisses and fucking. While he wasn’t going to make love, Sousuke still felt something different when he opened his eyes and saw Makoto close, their mouths parted pressed together, their breath ghosting over each other.

“Fuck,” Sousuke moaned out, unable to articulate anything else as he saw the way Makoto’s eyes seemed to glow.

He had to be half dreaming, brain irrational with desire as it wasn’t just the eyes that seemed greenish – there was something seeming to shimmer on Makoto’s skin. Yet Sousuke closed his eyes once again, trying to rationalise, as his final layers of clothes slipped away, his body perfectly naked against Makoto’s. They were on their sides, legs over legs, hands roaming over nipples, ass, thighs…

They fit together in a way that Sousuke hadn’t experienced before. He was so damn tall and broad that guys he’d slept with seemed so much smaller but Makoto was solid, firm, their cocks rubbing together perfectly as they kissed and ground up against each other, bodies knowing their needs.

Sousuke didn’t need to say anything, not when Makoto was panting into their kiss, not when his own body was thrumming with a desire that felt like nothing he had ever experienced. He felt like a damn virgin again, his hand reaching in between their bodies, wrapping around Makoto’s cock loosely as Makoto’s fingers dug into the skin of his shoulder.

It should hurt, Sousuke thought vaguely, both of them should hurt. Makoto had nearly died scant days ago and Makoto was digging into the skin of Sousuke’s sensitive shoulder but nothing hurt. It felt like nothing ever would. He felt an energy he had never experienced as Makoto’s tongue twirled and tasted, as his hips flexed against Sousuke’s, as his dick leaked pre-cum onto Sousuke’s skin, slicking the moves of his hand.

It was too long since Sousuke had done this and he wanted so much more. He wanted Makoto’s cock between his lips, tasting him in a way that was different from their kisses, feeling powerful as he made Makoto come hard. He wanted to be inside Makoto, have him on his hands and knees, Sousuke’s eyes watching the point they were connected, his dick diving in and out in long slow thrusts. And he wanted Makoto inside him, all the pain and disappointment evaporating as Sousuke wrapped his legs around Makoto’s waist as they moved together with languid jerks of hips as they had no desire to come quickly.

Yet this time, they were going to come quickly and Sousuke could feel that his own cock was ready to pulse. He wanted Makoto to come at the same time yet he felt his dick spurt and the strings of cum between them, his mouth moving from Makoto’s as he moaned out his pleasure.

Makoto’s mouth went to Sousuke’s neck, tongue laving at his pulse and Sousuke fisted at Makoto’s cock, slick from his cum, until he felt Makoto jerk and teeth bite into his skin. It felt sharp but it didn’t feel like pain. Not like the aches and injuries that Sousuke had felt before. He felt the pleasure along with the pain and he moaned out again, a curse through his barely open lips.

In apology, Makoto pressed butterfly kisses into Sousuke’s skin, each one feeling like a healing wish and Sousuke let his body relax into Makoto’s despite the stickiness that was between them. He knew he should feel guilt at the mess they had created yet he couldn’t care – not yet. As he felt an exhaustion he had never felt before. It wasn’t exhaustion that was painful, like being crushed by the weight of his own failed expectations instead there was a content feeling that he had never felt before. He wanted to stay in bed. He wanted to remain trapped in this moment even though he knew it wasn’t possible. Yet Makoto disturbed the moment with his words, muffled by the fact they were spoken into Sousuke’s skin.

“I think we should talk…” he said.

Sousuke grunted in agreement. “Soon.”

He wanted just a few more moments of bliss. Just a little bit longer to feel content. As moments of magic never lasted.


	15. Chapter 15

When Sousuke woke up his mouth felt dry and his skin still felt sticky. He moved, realising that he could, and he figured quickly that he was alone in the tiny bed. And that it was dark and stormy outside. Exactly how long had he been asleep?

His brain and body felt groggy, the way he had used to after an intense day of training and he felt confused at the entire waking up alone situation. Especially when he looked towards the window and saw rain splattering against the glass. It was still open, the window, as Makoto had done that earlier and Sousuke took a moment to register what the storm meant.

When he felt a wave of depression threatening to engulf him in the past, Sousuke would be quite happy to lie in a bed and watch the rain, his head sinking into a pillow and his body barely moving. But now he remembered. A storm meant Makoto was in danger. And Sousuke reacted despite the sluggish feeling in his limbs.

He dressed swiftly, his clothing rumpled and he tried to ignore the crusty feeling on his skin. There were other things to worry about. Namely Makoto.

Sousuke was finding it harder to ignore that there was _something_ about Makoto that was not quite… normal. The idea of magic still was something Sousuke couldn’t believe but he had seen Makoto’s eyes glow, seen the shimmer of his skin and there was something so damn sincere about Makoto. He had to believe a little bit of what Makoto believed… maybe not magic but maybe a sort of magic.

Dressed, Sousuke hurried down the stairs of the house and found himself intercepted by Hayato. While Sousuke didn’t want to meet anyone in the house, he was glad it was the little boy rather than his knowing grandmother or Kisumi who may look at Sousuke and suspect his ruffled state of appearance was due to something that had occurred in the bed.

“I’m scared,” Hayato said, “there’s noises.”

Sousuke wasn’t sure what to do. Kids really weren’t his strong point. Yet the little boy looked rumpled by sleep and Sousuke did the best he could. He knelt down, put a hand on the boys shoulder and offered an encouraging smile.

“It’s just a storm. I’m going to find Makoto and help him. Go back to sleep, it’ll be over by the morning.”

“I will,” the little boy said with a yawn and he dragged his feet as he walked up to bed.

As he watched Hayato walk back to his room, Sousuke noticed he was being watched.

“That was good advice. Are you going to help Makoto? He’s weak.”

Sousuke looked at the old woman, her face even more wrinkled than usual from concern and worry.

“I am.”

He wanted to add that he didn’t know how the hell he could help being that he still didn’t believe in this “Heart of Iwatobi” thing but instead, he offered a nod before he departed into the night and the storm.

Instinct and previous experience told Sousuke where to go as he jogged through the rain. Makoto would be at the beach. Makoto would be in the surf, half naked and trying to command the waves. But as Sousuke approached the ocean, grey as steel and threatening in its colourlessness, Sousuke did not see Makoto.

“Makoto!” he shouted, his voice lost in the rainstorm, “Makoto!”

He jogged along beside the beach, his strides long and he screamed Makoto’s name until he was hoarse. There was no answer and he looked out to the ocean hopelessly. Then he turned and remembered somewhere else in Iwatobi he knew. Where Makoto had first revealed who he was to Sousuke. The shrine.

Speeding his pace, Sousuke went in search of Makoto.  Deep down, he knew he was there. Sousuke was unable to explain _why_ he knew that but he did. The steps seemed steeper in the rain, each footfall heavier as he tried to take the steps two at a time. It was difficult to find the energy but Sousuke found it, his hair obscuring his vision and getting in his eyes.

When he arrived at the peak, Sousuke saw Makoto immediately and he was somewhat relieved to see that he wasn’t half naked as he was accustomed to seeing him in the rain. Instead, he was hooded, a damp blue hoodie covered his body as he knelt beside the stone commemorating the dead.

“Makoto,” Sousuke said, his words lost to the elements.

He approached, cautiously, and knelt beside Makoto, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

“You need to get inside. You’re weak.”

Makoto didn’t say anything and Sousuke could see his fingers were tracing the names that Sousuke himself recognised. Those of Kisumi and Hayato’s parents. Makoto was shaking either from cold or something else and he didn’t move into Sousuke’s embrace. Only stayed stoically looking forward in a way that seemed very unlike the Makoto that Sousuke knew. Or thought he knew.

“I can’t…,” Makoto mumbled. “I can’t be what the town needs…”

Unsure what to say, Sousuke tried his best at comforting Makoto. Even if Sousuke didn’t believe in magic, Makoto did and that meant that he felt a level of responsibility and guilt that Sousuke could barely comprehend. Least when Sousuke had got injured, he had only disappointed himself and his family and Rin. No one else had all their hopes on him. Failure was not so crushing.

“Let’s go. Go home. You need rest.”

Makoto turned, his eyes dimly glowing in the gloom. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise- ” Sousuke said, but he was interrupted by Makoto, who gripped onto Sousuke’s wrist tightly.

“I… used you. You’re strength.”

Sousuke’s mouth opened, no response forming for Makoto’s words.

“I realised what it was… that first time we met. You had strength. You are…. more than you know, Sousuke.”

Shaking his head, Sousuke reasoned that Makoto was delirious. Which had to be why he was talking crazy.  Or in fact, crazier than usual.

“No… you think you were broken but you’re not Sousuke… didn’t you feel it?”

He’d felt something, seen something, dreamed things since he’d met Makoto that were out of his experience. He’d felt the sensation of drowning, he’d seen green eyes gazing at him and felt a strange weakness that he couldn’t explain right now. And he no longer felt broken. Not like he had. Sousuke had found a new future and realised it was better to leave behind his Olympic swimmer dream and find something he could achieve.

“I don’t… understand,” Sousuke said, his voice cracking.

“I have a power, Sousuke, if you believe it or not. And a responsibility to the town. And you were my anchor… I was able to gain some of your strength once and I used it. For a while.”

“We should go… the storm.”

“I need to stop the storm,” Makoto said, getting to his feet unsteadily, “but I need your help. I need your strength.”

Sousuke looked at Makoto and tried not to laugh in some sort of hysteria. As Makoto looked almost wild – hood soaked and fabric sticking to his head, his eyes glowing slightly with dark bags underneath them and his teeth chattering from a numbing coldness that came from the rain that was falling on them both. Sousuke wanted to do something drastic. He thought about taking hold of Makoto and dragging him down the stairs and into the town – however unwilling Makoto was. It would be tricky, Makoto was nearly the same size as he was and so Sousuke tried to reason with Makoto.

“You’re sick. You’ll have a fever. You need to go to bed.”

That was all Makoto needed. He was raving. He was sick. There were rational responses. But Makoto pushed away at Sousuke and started to walk, his head bowed and his body clearly exhausted.

“No… I need to protect the town. There are fishing boats out there.”

He could see the determination in Makoto’s pose but Sousuke knew that he wasn’t strong enough for whatever he was going to do. He couldn’t stand in the ocean and control the waves or whatever Makoto did. He would be washed away, his body dashed on the nearby rocks and so Sousuke followed, a pace behind.

“You can’t go alone.”

As he followed, Sousuke tried to decide how he could stop Makoto from making his stubborn decision yet he was out of any ideas. He felt an impending sense of doom, the world unbelievably quiet apart from the rain that fell on their heads and the paths under foot.

They got to the beach and Sousuke saw Makoto not even pause to strip. He only started to walk towards the water, his gaze glowing brighter as he approached.

It was magic. It had to be as not only was Makoto’s eyes glowing, his whole body had a shimmering light surrounding him and Sousuke started when Makoto’s grabbed him hand, dragging him towards the water.

He hit the water with Makoto and came up to the surface spluttering, the depth deeper than it had seemed. And as he reached the surface and took a deep breath again, his lungs filling, he found his body dragged back underneath. Makoto was pulling him, or something that was like Makoto, as suddenly while he looked like Makoto there was something else inhabiting that body and Sousuke felt like he was a small fish in a pond with a predator ready to pounce.

Yet as Sousuke struggled, sinking, the water cleared and the world seemed to change. Sousuke felt his body stop at the bottom of the ocean, the sand underneath him, and he saw silvery flickers of fish and creatures around him. He thought he saw a hulking mass of a whale shark above him, it’s speckled body glimmering as an orca followed after it. It wasn’t prey, even though it should be, they just swam alongside one another.

Sousuke knew he should feel cold. And heavy. And he should feel like he couldn’t breathe out of his choked lungs but he could. Not breathe exactly, but he wasn’t dying, he wasn’t drowning. Makoto was there, his hood removed, his eyes glimmering and glittering and his smile serene. Makoto closed his eyes and entwined their hands, their fingers wrapped around one another, and he felt his body jerk as if picked up by a large wave.

He tried to stop himself moving, digging his suddenly bare feet into the sand under him. Sousuke needed to stay exactly where he was – he was not sure why but he need to anchor them both. Anchor. That was what Makoto had called him. Strong. Sturdy. Dependable. Not doomed or broken. Solid.

And in that digging his feet into sand, the water rushing around him and ringing in his ears, Sousuke finally believed in magic. As he looked up, he saw the sky clear, the clouds part and he found his body floating weightlessly to the surface, all his effort gone into helping Makoto and the town of Iwatobi. He could never explain what they had done. And he never would. But he let his body rise and he took a deep breath of air as he floated on his back and looked at the stars above.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're now only two (shortish) chapters after this one until this fic is finally complete. Thanks for those who've kept reading throughout.

There was a feeling of euphoria that consumed Sousuke – so much so that it felt like he wasn’t himself anymore. Sousuke felt different, felt as though his skin was glistening, that his eyes were glowing and that his whole body was lighter than it had ever felt before. It was as though he was drunk – not that he really know that feeling due to being an athlete for most of his life – but still he guessed this was how it felt. It was almost like an out of body experience and he was barely conscious of what was going on around him.

He didn’t know what had happened immediately after they had calmed the storm. Yet somehow they had ended up back at Makoto’s house and Sousuke was stood in Makoto’s bathroom. Sousuke guessed that it was Makoto who had brought him back, dragged him, or half-carried him, but Sousuke couldn’t remember at all. All he could remember was the feeling of magic pulsing underneath his skin and the water flowing around him and over him, cleansing his body.

Makoto had helped Sousuke strip down to his underwear, he remembered that, as his own hands were clumsy due to the cold or something else entirely. He had soothed Sousuke, his voice calm and his own fears and uncertainties seemingly forgotten at least for now while he focused on Sousuke.

“Don’t worry, take as long as you need. The twins are out at school and my parents are at work,” Makoto said as he left Sousuke, alone and mostly naked, in an unfamiliar bathroom.

He was still in damp underwear, Makoto saving Sousuke the embarrassment of stripping him fully, Sousuke used his trembling fingers to pull them down. The shower was already running, the warmth of the water creating condensation on the glass of the mirror and the windows. Sousuke stepped towards the mirror and wiped at the condensation on it so he could see his own reflection. He expected to see something different, to see that he had changed yet his reflection looked as it had always done – though he was damp and paler than usual.

Stepping into the warmth water felt like something akin to a spiritual moment and Sousuke let his head hang to allow the water to flow over his head. He would be too tall for it otherwise. He suddenly realised how cold he had been as he felt the warmth of the showers water – his teeth had been chattering – Sousuke just had not noticed it before.

His body suddenly felt heavy again, as though it was weighed down with lead, and his shoulder twinged in pain in a way that it hadn’t since he had attempted to train with it despite his injury. When he had tried to hide the agony he felt as he swam, sometimes managing yet most of the time failing.

Shaking, his legs feeling unsteady, Sousuke sat on the floor of the shower, his skin slick and his hair in his eyes. He gripped his shoulder tightly, digging his fingers into his skin as though he could take away the pain inside his skin by making marks on the surface…

“Sousuke.”

He looked up, saw Makoto dressed in sweatpants and a loose t-shirt and without considering the state of his clothing, he walked into the shower and joined Sousuke on the floor of the shower.

“Sorry… I forgot how hard this can be the first time around. If you need to be sick…”

Sousuke shook his head. His stomach felt odd but he didn’t feel nauseous. Indeed, the pain had subsided slightly now that Makoto had joined him. Instinctively, Sousuke leaned his head against Makoto’s shoulder and he felt an arm wrap around him, pulling him closer.

“Did you know… from the beginning that I…?” Sousuke asked, unable to phrase what he wanted to ask.

Sousuke was more than aware that he was bad at talking yet he supposed even the most eloquent person would struggle to discuss magical powers. It made it sound like a fairy tale.

“On that first meeting, I had no idea… not until we touched and I tried to heal you. Then I didn’t know what that connection meant but I did my research… read diaries by other people who were the “heart” and many of them had someone like you.”

“Like me?”

“Someone to anchor them.”

Anchor. The word echoed through Sousuke’s head and he remembered the need he felt to bed his feet into the sand and hold himself against the waves. It had not just been for him. It had been for Makoto. To provide strength for him. It felt oddly reassuring as it gave Sousuke some kind of weird purpose. A purpose that was beyond his own limitations and it didn’t matter that his shoulder was fucked and his swimming career was over.

“You need to rest,” Makoto said, his words almost mirroring Sousuke’s own days before.

Makoto leaned over and turned off the water and got to his feet, his clothes soaking wet and his hair clinging to his forehead. He offered Sousuke his hand and Sousuke took it, getting to his feet. As he did, the world span and Sousuke needed a second before it righted itself to the way it was meant to be. He stumbled into Makoto, his hand gripping around Makoto’s forearm and he was clinging in a way that made him very conscious that he was very naked and that they were very _close_

Makoto’s eyes sparkled and Sousuke wondered if it was just his imagination or if they _did_. Or maybe it was something that he could only see. He didn’t know yet they were beautiful and pure and green. And he could see that the beads of water on his eyelashes that seemed to glisten. Sousuke shook his head slightly, looked at the water that dripped down the tiles as he was being far too romantic for his own good.

Maybe it was like the residual magic or his weakness from the whole experience but Sousuke felt reckless. And it was enough recklessness for him to respond to the feel of Makoto’s skin.

Without his usual self-doubt and his fears of failure, Sousuke pressed his lips to Makoto’s, his reluctance and reticence gone. 

Together they walked, half stumbled out of the bathroom, their lips still connected and their hands gripping one another. Sousuke would’ve been more conscious about his nakedness as he walked through the unfamiliar house but he didn’t care. Makoto had told them they were alone and Sousuke let himself be dragged into Makoto’s room, the pull of desire guiding him as much as Makoto’s hands holding him tight around the neck.

Once they were in Makoto’s room – the room where it had started so long ago – Sousuke helped Makoto to shimmy out of his wet clothes. A task that would’ve been easier if Makoto had stepped away but Sousuke wanted their bodies connected as much as possible and he didn’t let him move away. Not now. Not ever. Sousuke felt an possessiveness, a need that far surpassed his pathetic past teenage lusty encounters.

They tumbled onto Makoto’s bed, a “meow” signalling that Jiji had been situated on the bed prior to the rude interruption of two naked bodies. Makoto laughed softly as they bounced, their combined body weight making the bed creak.

“Jiji will forgive me later,” Makoto said, his words said breathlessly, and Sousuke smiled into the skin of Makoto’s neck.

It was easy to kiss Makoto, it felt natural, like breathing and Sousuke let his lips trail down Makoto’s body, taking in each bump and ridge. He saw scars and he saw the dips of his muscles and he licked at the water droplets on his torso. Makoto’s hands threaded through Sousuke’s hair, touching and fussing with the strands, and Sousuke looked up to see the green eyes that always seemed to glow and he smiled and rested his head against Makoto’s chest, listening to his heart. The “Heart of Iwatobi”.

It was beating fast and Sousuke tapped out the rhythm on Makoto’s skin.

“You should stay. In Iwatobi.”

Sousuke looked up then, saw the sincerity of Makoto’s expression, the openness in his look and Sousuke’s own heart skipped a beat. He had to go back to Tokyo…he knew he did. He had to start his university course. He had to actually talk to his parents. He had to see Rin and apologise for making him worry like the asshole he was…

“I can’t stay,” Sousuke said and he saw for a moment that Makoto looked crushed. Crest-fallen. But then Sousuke climbed fully on top of him, his hand finding one of Makoto’s and holding it tight. “But I’ll always come back.”

If he were a cheesier guy, he’d explain that he felt this pull to Makoto, that he needed to be with him, that he was anchored to him. It would be perfect, his words, and romantic and only a slight bit cheesy. But he couldn’t do that. He could only kiss Makoto and put all his feelings into the kiss.

The kiss became sloppy, teeth clashing and noses bumping, and Sousuke moaned into it when Makoto stroked his cock firmly from base to tip, his thumb teasing round the slit and using pre-cum to ease his movement. Sousuke grunted and stilled that hand. He didn’t want just handjobs.

With lube hidden underneath the mattress, Sousuke prepped Makoto with all the care he could manage. He licked at Makoto’s cock, long swipes and teasing prods, the taste of him intoxicating. Makoto had his arm across his eyes as his breath came in heavy heaves, each one of those noises and twitches too damn sexy. Sousuke used his fingers, feeling the warm tightness and he closed his eyes as he took Makoto’s large dick as far down his own throat as he could manage. A hand balled tight in his hair and Sousuke came up for breath, saliva dribbling down his chin.

His face flushed and eyes bright, Makoto ground out words through gritted teeth. “Fuck me.”

Sousuke grabbed hold of Makoto’s thighs, helping him so that they were wrapped around his waist. He lined up his cock and pushed into the tightness of Makoto’s hole slowly at first, flexing his hips backwards and the forwards, driving himself forward until they were as close as they could be.  

Breathless, Sousuke closed his eyes and tried to breathe. It was over-whelming. Like drowning. And all Sousuke could do was let himself drown.

They moved together slow at first, getting used to one another, Sousuke gripped at Makoto’s ass and Makoto moved up into all of Sousuke’s thrusts, driving him deeper inside and making them feel closer than Sousuke felt possible.

Hot, sticky, the remains of the shower water mixing with sweat, they sped up their pace and when Sousuke felt his body start to tire, Makoto moved and sat in Sousuke’s lap taking over the thrust as he bounced up and down on Sousuke’s dick.

“Makoto…fuck…” Sousuke moaned and he found his mouth licking and kissing at any part of Makoto he could find. His cheek, his lips, his forehead, his neck…

“Close…” Makoto uttered and Sousuke could feel Makoto’s thighs trembling through the effort.

Makoto threw his head back as he stroked his long cock and Sousuke cried out his passion as his hips jerked forward and his dick pulsed deep inside Makoto’s body. Sousuke thrust up a few more times and he felt the spurt of warmth against his own stomach and chest that signalled Makoto’s climax and there were a few more shuddering movements before they collapsed onto the bed, their bodies trembling from all their exertion.

Exhausted, sticky and feeling an odd tingling underneath his skin, Sousuke smiled softly as Makoto went to the bathroom to bring towels to clean up the mess they had made. That done, Makoto offered Sousuke some of his clothes and they both dressed in casual clothes and lay back on the bed once more.

Makoto put on the television onto some random quiz show and Jiji made her return from her exile during their activities and Sousuke let himself relax fully. As while he hadn’t believed in magic before, he did now and he realised there was more than one type of magic.


	17. Chapter 17

The apartment in which Sousuke shared in Tokyo felt lonely despite the continuous presence of either Rin, Haru or some of their fellow swim team members. Haru, despite having a place of his own which he shared with some friends (irritating friends – a far too perky blond with a very serious dude with glasses) seemed to spend most of his time attached to Rin’s side. To be fair, Haru barely said anything and they could sit in companionable silence when Rin was otherwise occupied so it wasn’t an annoyance. Instead, he was always just _there._

Sousuke guessed he felt lonely as Rin and Haru’s relationship, subtle as they were, was always in his face and this only made him miss Makoto and Iwatobi even more than he thought possible. He had grown to feel at home there – surrounded by now familiar people – and he felt isolated back in Tokyo where everyone was very much completing their own daily activities. It didn’t help matters that Sousuke had stayed for an extra week in Iwatobi and had missed his first few weeks of classes and had not had the benefit of his first introductory sessions to learn his classmates names at the very least.

It seemed that Sousuke’s fellow students had already begun the process of bonding without his being there – seats had been selected in the lecture halls and friendship groups had been established and Sousuke didn’t have the inclination to try and make himself part of those.

He did enjoy the studying and the subject matter but Sousuke knew that his heart wasn’t in it. He did miss Makoto. But he needed to at least try to start his career as a therapist even if it wasn’t quite the right time for him to commit to it.

Sousuke was sat on the futon that was the only piece of furniture in the living/kitchen/dining area and was attempting to study. He had selected the most comfortable spot on the threadbare piece of furniture and he was sat with his text book and a cup of tea at his feet. He looked as though he was studying hard, a pencil tucked behind his ear so that he could make annotations and notes in the margins if required. Yet it was purely an aesthetic thing as Sousuke had stared at the same page of his chapter since he had opened the book and his eyes were _seeing_ words but he was not taking them in.

Rin was currently out on a run and Haru had left for a class so Sousuke by all intents and purposes, _should_ be able to study without distractions. Yet he couldn’t.  Of course, it was Makoto that was distracting him even though they had agreed to this long distance relationship and that Sousuke had to return to his life and start his studies in order for him to find his purpose in life and a new career. It now just seemed a stupid agreement to Sousuke as his head and heart clearly weren’t where they needed to be. It was in Iwatobi.

He had checked the weather multiple times on his phone and he started and deleted a hundred messages to Makoto in the half an hour he had attempted to study. The one message that Sousuke had actually sent to Makoto had been replied to swiftly and Makoto had confirmed it was a boring and safe day in Iwatobi. But Sousuke couldn’t seem to stop the pull and longing in his gut that made him want to beside Makoto.

He had spent a week in Iwatobi after the storm and it had felt like a vacation from reality. He alternated his time between his usual guest house and Makoto’s home. He had played with Makoto’s siblings and even brought Hayato along with him at times for playdates. Sousuke had been formally introduced to Makoto’s parents and there had been family dinners that Sousuke had been invited to.

There had also been the times they were alone. They had eaten sweet treats together, ran together and sat beside one another on the beach as the sun was setting, both enjoying the spectacle and looking out for a sign of bad weather on the horizon.

They had fucked in every way that Sousuke knew and they had done some things that Sousuke had only seen on the internet before. They tasted and touched one another in the quiet hours in the Tachibana house, slowly moving against one another in orgasm that still seemed to tingle and send shivers down Sousuke’s spine. Each time felt new, different, and Sousuke had never come so many times in quick succession and never been so needy and addicted to anything in his life. His body would tremble from the intensity and exertion each time and magic always seem to shift just underneath his skin.

Just thinking about Makoto and the breathlessness he felt as he slid inside Sousuke’s body was enough to make his skin heat up and his boxer briefs become tighter. It made any though of studying impossible. To try and banish those thoughts, Sousuke turned the pages back of his book to pages he had already read in an attempt to stop himself from an unwanted erection.

It was a good thing he did this as with his usual clatter, Rin arrived back from his run and was walking into the room.

“Hey,” Rin said, his breathing heavy and sweat beading on his forehead.

Sousuke nodded and tried to return his attention back of his textbook to at least look like he had not wasted the time since Rin had left by _not_ studying.

Rin went to the kitchen and clattered around for a few moments before departing to the shower. Not bothering to look up, Sousuke continued his attempt to read his textbook, he really did, but it was only when Rin re-emerged into the room, showered and dressed, did Sousuke realise he had not taken anything in again and there was no point in pretending otherwise.

“Good page?” Rin asked, grinning broadly as he took a seat next to Sousuke.

“Ha,” Sousuke responded, his sarcasm obvious, “just things on my mind.”

“ _Things_ as in Makoto?” Rin teased.

Sousuke sighed and decided he might as well give up the pretence of studying as it wasn’t working anyway. Rin had seen through him. Like his best friend always damn well did.

“Yeah.”

“I know you thought it would be best to come back and study, Sou, but you come, on – you’re fucking miserable. More miserable than usual. In fact, you are a big grumpy asshole pretty much 24/7 around here.”

“Thanks for the pep talk,” Sousuke replied gruffly as he removed the pencil from behind his ear and let it drop to the floor.

“What I’m saying is… maybe check whether you can study part-time or whatever. Defer it til next year. As you obviously need this Makoto dude and you’re being so damn annoying and mopey without him.”

“You just want me outta the way so you can invite Haru to live here and screw around whenever you want, right?”

Rin shook his head and chuckled. “Yeah, well, shower sex would be a possibility again without you being on the other side of the thin wall. And Haru is so damn bendy… it’s been a sacrifice.”

Sousuke kicked at Rin for his melodramatic use of the word sacrifice prompting a slap back.

“But… seriously. I want you to be happy. So go. Figure it out. Studying can happen whenever. I’ll be here whenever. And whenever you want me to kick your ass in pool, we can do that. Just you need to be somewhere else, Sousuke.”

Sousuke nodded, unable to say anything, and instead he grabbed for Rin and pulled him for a bear hug. Rin wriggled free after a suffocating twenty seconds.

“You must _really_ love that guy to act like that.”

“I do,” Sousuke replied, unable to keep a serious expression as a small smile crossed his lips.

And with that, he got up from the futon and ignored the textbook and pencil on the floor. He didn’t think about the practicalities – only packed his bags. He would think about that eventually but right now he just followed where his heart told him to go.


	18. Chapter 18

**Epilogue**

It seemed Jiji had a new favourite spot for her early morning nap. And it was on top of the keyboard of Sousuke’s laptop. He had only turned his back for one moment, to serve tea, and then when he had returned to his spot behind the counter, Jiji had already commandeered the spot.

Sousuke wanted to shoo the cat away and continue on his current research paper but then he figured the animals actions were some kind of sign that he should take a break so he let Jiji stay where she was. He picked up his notebook, checked where he had go to from his haphazard notes and starred that point so he could pick it up whenever the damn cat allowed him.

Jiji gave a half-hearted “meow” in Sousuke’s direction as he moved the laptop further out of the way but she didn’t make any attempt to change her positon, only flicked her tail.

“You win, Jiji,” Sousuke muttered.

He sometimes wondered if Jiji’s intent in life was distract him from _ever_ completing his assignments and it seemed she had a conspirator in the guise of Makoto who was often a distraction in his own endearing way. Yet he supposed he was fine. He had a few more weeks until the deadline and the paper was all there in note form. It would not take long for it to be complete. If he ever got free of the distractions….

Distractions were common in Iwatobi. And they were not just Jiji and Makoto. The café itself was the main distraction. When Sousuke had returned to the town, he had no plan at all for his future. He had not discussed his studying, he had not discussed where he was going to live or what was going to happen. He had jumped without looking and soon found himself having to make a series of decisions quickly. He found he could study part-time and travel to Tokyo once every few weeks so he had opted to that. And once that decision had been made, Sousuke and Makoto had to decide what to do with their living situation. Sousuke was more than welcome at the guest house and Hayato would’ve _loved_ for Sousuke to take permanent residence there but Sousuke couldn’t impose, at least not for anything but the short term. Of course, he was welcome in the Tachibana residence but it felt odd to stay and sleep on the floor and steal kisses in the night. It was not perfect.

They had decided to try and find somewhere to live and it was then that they saw the old café that had fallen into disrepair. Near to the ocean with accommodation above. They had looked at it and known. This was going to be home.

Money and help had been needed. They had plans. The café would be as it always had been but the upstairs would have a treatment room for both Makoto and Sousuke could use. Of course, Makoto was able to use for his own mysterious healing techniques yet Sousuke had to wait until he had passed his course. Then he could heal too.

The families had helped and along with Sousuke’s father resources and skills, a few scant months later they were living there. And a few more months they had a café to run. It had caused many distractions but Sousuke wouldn’t change it for the world. It felt like he truly had a place to live, to grow old in and belong. And that feeling was all due to Makoto.

The café was close enough to the sea that it could be _just_ seen if you sat at the table by the window and from the window of their bedroom, it could be seen fully. It meant that when they slept, they could always hear the changes of the weather which alleviated both of their anxieties.

It made it feel like a very peaceful existence. And it was. As Sousuke would wake each morning alone apart from the cat but he would not feel abandoned or lost. He would know that Makoto had gone for his jog and Sousuke would complete his morning routines and the opening up of the café until Makoto returned. Sousuke knew why Makoto jogged each morning. He would go around the whole of Iwatobi, watch from high above out to sea and at the shoreline and he would see whether his unique power would be needed in that day. While Makoto did this, Sousuke would deal with deliveries and the earliest customers, though Sousuke’s eyes would always glance towards the door to the café as he waited for the brief touch and press of lips he would receive on Makoto’s return if the place was quiet enough.

Despite the distractions of his new life – boyfriend, café and cat included, Sousuke was doing the required studying when he got the opportunity. He completed his assignments at home yet travelled regularly and stayed with Rin to attend things he was required to. It was working. Yes, it was difficult but Sousuke wanted to do it. As despite the fact he was Makoto’s anchor, in both a metaphorical and literal sense, Sousuke also needed his own purpose. Training to be a physiotherapist would do that. As he could help those who had pain like he did.

One customer departed and Sousuke was left alone in the café. He walked over and picked up the cup to wash later and glanced out of the window for any sign of Makoto’s return from his jog. While there was no sign of Makoto, the day itself was beautiful, the spring sunshine streaming through despite the lingering chill and Sousuke smiled softly as he walked back towards his spot behind the counter. It wasn’t the life he had planned as Sousuke had dreamed of medals and sponsorship deals and international travel but it was the life he had and he would not sacrifice it for the world. Even if he did miss pushing his body to the limit and adrenalin coursing through his veins.

Sousuke realised he was daydreaming, his mind clearly elsewhere and the empty cup in his hand forgotten, when a familiar customer had appeared right in front of him. Without Sousuke even realising that she had entered the shop. And a customer who unceremoniously smacked him hard on the arm.

“I’d like tea. And some of those pastries you get… the ones with the strawberries.”

Sousuke nodded and mumbled out an apology as his old landlady took her usual seat by the window. The seat where the ocean could _just_ be seen. She was alone – her grandsons at school and work respectively. While Kisumi had somewhat warmed to Sousuke and forgiven Makoto and Hayato was a big fan of both of them, Sousuke was glad it was just her. As there were no other customers, Sousuke made himself a strong black coffee and brought over the tea and pastries on a tray.

“Joining me?” she asked and Sousuke merely nodded. “Good.”

They sat together, talking about the week and the weather and the world in general. For a guy who had never been a big talker, Sousuke had always felt at ease with the old woman and now even more so. There flow of idle chatter was only stalled when Makoto returned, his hair damp with sweat and his eyes glowing in that subdued fashion that made Sousuke’s heart beat a little bit faster.

“Any problems?” Sousuke asked, getting to his feet.

“No, it’s a beautiful day,” Makoto replied and seeing that they only had one customer, he brushed a brief kiss across Sousuke’s lips. A kiss that tasted of salt water and the promise of sunshine.

Makoto departed, telling them both he smelt and needed a shower, and offering apologies as he backed into a table and sent a small vase of fake flowers rolling to the floor. Sousuke only rolled his eyes as Makoto apologised again and he cleaned up the mess, thankful that nothing had broken. His task complete and Makoto safely away from anything he could destroy, Sousuke sat back down so he could finish the last swig of coffee.

The old woman was smiling softly, her eyes crinkling in the corner as she did. “There’s more than one way to heal,” she said wisely.

“Huh?” Sousuke mumbled.

“You came to Iwatobi to heal your shoulder and go back to your swimming career. That didn’t happen but you are healed in another way, aren’t you?”

Sousuke felt a prod of bony fingers on his arm and he glanced around the café as he listened to the old pipes clatter as Makoto took his shower. He thought of where he had come from – that place where he was so desperate for a cure, for a way to swim competitively again, and how he had been obsessed with that being the only thing he could do. It wasn’t the only thing Sousuke could do. He realised that now.

“And do you believe in the Heart of Iwatobi and magic now?”

With a smile, Sousuke drank the last bit of his coffee and put the cup down on the table.

“Kind of,” he answered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this took a super long time so I am really grateful to all those people who still read the fic. I'm sure this fic changed a lot from my original plans (which I barely remember) but always knew this was the ending. So hopefully no one will be disappointed.   
> Thanks for reading - M


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